The dark cold black hole ocean of fear turns into an ink bubble (and year 4 day 3)

Yesterday, my low back pain got really bad, so I started looking for help. I was lead to a really awesome acupuncturist, and got a really great session.

My back pain is rooted in terror, much of it frozen terror.

Terror is rooted in the kidneys, according to the Chinese Paradigm. So I have been working with the kidneys.

To me, it has always been a black hole, and if I got too near, it would suck me in.

Yet...

During the acupuncture session, I saw this black hole turn into an ink bubble, and further saw it getting dispersed throughout the rest of my body. In acupuncture, the energy runs in meridians, kind of like rivers of water flowing through the body.

And there are places, or points where those rivers interesect, and it is these points where they put the teeny-tiny needles, so that one river can help carry the load of another river, they can criss-cross, ultimately bring balance to the whole energy system.

For me, this energy got trapped in my kidneys as terror, and only expressed as rage, which results in more terror.

Rage and terror are buddies. They hang out in the same bar. Talk a lot. They are a tag team. The angriest people on the planet are the most fearful people on the planet.

Anyway, I feel like this terror energy is getting chunked up, kind of like the image of a cookie crumbling. Today, I have the back pain off and on, but I am starting to see it differently: instead of pain, I see it as energy getting chunked up, distributed, and released. And I feel like it is moving out.

Today, I bathed my kidneys in Love and Life-Force Energy (along with bathing the 4th year of my life in Love - bathing that small boy's kidney's in Love) and it felt really good. During todays session, I did my best to relax my hands as much as possible, and just allow this Life-Force to flow. I saw this "black goo" bubbling up and flowing out, down through multiple channels, emptying out of me forever. Draining. God/dess knows, I have carried this long enough. Instead of being a clear flowing river of energy, my kidneys have become a stagnant, stinky, cold, terrifying place - and that is where all my "stuff" all my trauma, is being stored.

The acupuncturist?

Jason T. Hamm, www.blueginkgomedicine.com

He is a true professional.

Now I know why I am drinking so much water!