Starting today, I am going to walk 3 miles a day for 7 days straight. I just got through my first three miles. I walked Liam in his stroller to downtown Lawrence and back. It was very warm, and very windy.
I am going to do this to kick start my exercising, and see how many benefits I can gain from this for 7 days. I will see if I lose more weight this week, and how I feel.
Saturday, January 31, 2009
Sending Love into The Heart-Based Network
In sending Love/Energy into The Heart-Based Network, and to all who are, or will be contained within its pages, I always experience deep, profound feelings of transcendent joy. I breathe deeply and continuously, and I use my imagination to ascend my heart into the Universe, and to then allow Love to roll and cascade through my hands and into the book.During my session today, I could sense and feel all the Ascended Masters that I have placed in it, being with me in the transmission of this Love. It felt really fantastic. I wrote down several more names and put them in the pages of this book, with the sacred prayer that the Love sent into this book will have a positive impact upon them, for their highest and greatest good.
My goal is to see over 10,000 Heart-Based Network books filled up with as many people, photographs, names, and intentions as possible.
My goal is to see the divine, ecstatic potential of Unconditional Love released, unleashed, and opened up all around the planet, to help ease the suffering of others and bring harmony and balance to the Earth.
There are multiple ways to place yourself into the pages of the Heart-Based Network, and receive this constant flow of Pure Love:
1. Simply write out your name and email to to me, and ask me to place your name within the pages of this book. I will then write out your name on a post it note, and put it on a blank page of this book. Then, everytime I breathe deeply and channel Reiki/Love/Light/Joy/Energy into this book, you will receive it for your highest and greatest good.
2. Or, mail or email me your photograph, and I will place your photograph on a blank page of The Heart-Based Network. You could also write out an intention below your photograph of anything you wish to heal, attract, create, or manifest. Then your "photographic intention" will be bathed in this Energy every day.
3. You could also send me your email address for a new experiment. Universal Energy flows through the medium of the Internet extremely well. This is because the Internet is one step closer to the "mental, spiritual Internet" where we are all one. So, this is how it works: just send me your email address, and ask to be placed within the pages of The Heart-Based Network. I will then print your email and post it, along with others, on a blank page. Here is the intention: Every time you open your email, or read email, or write email, you will feel Universal Love flowing through you. THIS IS NOT AN EMAIL LIST. YOU WILL NEVER RECEIVE ANY EMAILS FROM ME OF ANY KIND. Your email is given to me for the sole purpose of sending Energy through your email. You could call it "Reiki by email" Hehe.
When I feel Love cascading through me, and tears begin to bulge in my eyes and flow down my face, I feel so incredible, so amazing, so light, so huge and humble at the same time.
It truly is my life mission, to advance the power of love in this world.
Sending Universal Love through my hands
Yesterday, I held the photographs of my two boys between my hands, breathed deeply and continuously, and sent them Universal Life Force Energy/Love for 10 minutes. It was a deeply powerful, emotional experience for me, and at the end of the day, they both had really great days at school.
Both my boys have emotional trauma and attachment issues surrounding their early life experiences, and from being adopted. As I sent Love into their photographs, I could see in my minds eye that there was a time in their past, before they were with us, where they cried and cried, and did not get their needs met. It was really hard, but as I used my intention and channeled Love, in my imagination I went back in time, and bathed those beautiful little boys in Love. I sent the Energy back to their early childhoods. In my mind, I picked them both up and held them, and gave them a bottle that said "Love" on the side of it.
I also did some "proxy" or "surrogate" Emotional Freedom Techniques tapping for both of them. (That is when we tap on our acupressure points for the direct and immediate benefit of someone else) I tapped for all the trauma and pain that each of them went through.
When I used my breath and sent Love into their photographs, I wholeheartedly believe that that Energy went directly into my two boys, and that it helped them on some deep level.
I know it really, really helped me.
When we combine our Love with our Imagination with our Breath, we can create miracles.
Both my boys have emotional trauma and attachment issues surrounding their early life experiences, and from being adopted. As I sent Love into their photographs, I could see in my minds eye that there was a time in their past, before they were with us, where they cried and cried, and did not get their needs met. It was really hard, but as I used my intention and channeled Love, in my imagination I went back in time, and bathed those beautiful little boys in Love. I sent the Energy back to their early childhoods. In my mind, I picked them both up and held them, and gave them a bottle that said "Love" on the side of it.
I also did some "proxy" or "surrogate" Emotional Freedom Techniques tapping for both of them. (That is when we tap on our acupressure points for the direct and immediate benefit of someone else) I tapped for all the trauma and pain that each of them went through.
When I used my breath and sent Love into their photographs, I wholeheartedly believe that that Energy went directly into my two boys, and that it helped them on some deep level.
I know it really, really helped me.
When we combine our Love with our Imagination with our Breath, we can create miracles.
small amounts of food
Last night I had a small amount of food, and this morning, I wake up with a good feeling about my nutritional adventure. I feel even more committed to continuing to blend my raw juices. I want this to be a permanent change. The biggest thing that needs improvement is the exercising, which has been totally non-existent this week. It has been cold, and getting up in the morning just doesn't appeal to me. This next week, I am going to commit to more exercise.
So, yesterday, I drank my blended, raw vegetable juice during the day, and last night I had a bowl of tomato soup, a teeny portion of my wife's pasta and roasted tomatos (and I mean, the portion size of a 2 year old) my normal nightly fruit smoothie, some almonds, wheat crackers, and some popcorn. We watched Kung-Fu Panda as a family, which was really funny.
Now, this morning, I don't feel like I let myself down. I am looking forward to juicing again today, to getting some exercise, and to having a really small bowl of soup tonight. Eating just a little, I feel stronger and more capable.
So, yesterday, I drank my blended, raw vegetable juice during the day, and last night I had a bowl of tomato soup, a teeny portion of my wife's pasta and roasted tomatos (and I mean, the portion size of a 2 year old) my normal nightly fruit smoothie, some almonds, wheat crackers, and some popcorn. We watched Kung-Fu Panda as a family, which was really funny.
Now, this morning, I don't feel like I let myself down. I am looking forward to juicing again today, to getting some exercise, and to having a really small bowl of soup tonight. Eating just a little, I feel stronger and more capable.
Thursday, January 29, 2009
some almonds, two pieces of soy cheese, and a few carrots
Tonight, I did it.
I broke down and had some almonds, two pieces of soy cheese, and a few carrots.
It was g-o-o-d.
:)
Yes, my juicing continues.
I broke down and had some almonds, two pieces of soy cheese, and a few carrots.
It was g-o-o-d.
:)
Yes, my juicing continues.
Not feeling good emotionally - Day 18
All days can't be great. Yesterday, I did a piece of legal work that normally I wouldn't feel bad at all about. But this time, I feel like crap. My stomach is turning, and it just doesn't feel good to me. I am pretty sure that my diet and my fire breathing is bringing up old emotions stored in my body, in my belly, in my consciousness. They are coming up to be released, so that I can live a more clear, authentic life.
I just have to tell myself this: I am not what I do. I am not a lawyer. I am a divine, spiritual, infinite being, who happens to be wearing the mask of a lawyer to get money and support my family. I am not what I do. I don't want to identify with being a lawyer.
Yes, there are parts of it that I like. The flexible schedules. The easy money. The variety of being able to move around from place to place and not be trapped in a cublicle. Meeting different people.
And yes, there are parts I don't like. The deep feeling of unease and nervousness that comes from worrying about messing up a case and getting sued. Dealing with people who are really low, depressed, and refuse to be responsible for their lives. Representing people that I would like to see behind bars forever. Feeling like I have to separate my values from my work.
Last night and today, I am feeling really crumby about being a lawyer. It all stems from feeling like I "sold out" when I got out of law school, and carrying that thought around with me all of these years. Juicing, and asking all these blasted questions all the time, has brought up these old feelings.
I am not a sell out.
Yes you are.
No I am not.
Yes you are. You gave up on living your dreams so you could be a stinking attorney swimming around like a gutter shark.
I did not. Being a lawyer has brought me profound blessings, including an amazing, diverse, world family, and the ability to do all kinds of personal growth things that I normally would never have been able to afford.
Can't you have all that without being a lawyer?
I wouldn't be where I am, with my wife, my children, my personal growth, my spiritual life, all the creative stuff I have done. There is no more inherent virtue in being a waiter than there is in being a lawyer. Plus, I have tried (and I will continue to try) to create more books and more audios to hopefully give me the freedom to give it up.
Give it up now.
No. That would be ridiculous, irresponsible. I cannot support a family of 7 without an attorneys salary -and even with an attorneys salary, I will be strapped at times. My life purpose is to raise these amazing children. You young, naive 26 year old, you don't realize so many things. You didn't sell out. You went down the stream. There are no accidents. I have the gift of hindsight, and you have the burning, angry idealism - with no vision whatsoever. There is nothing wrong with being a lawyer.
Bullshit.
Your impossible. But that's okay. I forgive you. I forgive the thought, and the feeling, that you have, of selling out. Look at where we are at now. We have such an amazing life - filled with so much incredible joy. There is no way you could have predicted, or even planned, the amazingly beautiful like we have now. Things turned out, and continue to unfold, perfectly, can't you see? You need to stop resenting me. I have a lot more experience now, and I have done a lot of healing work, with much more to day. And I can see that there are no accidents. There are no mistakes. We are right where we need to be. And yes, I would love to find something to replace the law that has the same pay and flexibility and benefits. Do you have any ideas, young idealistic man?
Okay, well maybe being a gutter, slime-ball attorney has brought you many benefits. And perhaps the profession isn't all bad. All lawyers aren't scum-bags. I got so ugly, disenchanted, cynical, about the whole legal system and legal profession in my third year of law school, and I never really resolved that conflict. But I have to feel and be who I am. I have to live authentically, but I don't know how to go about doing that. Dad never set a really great example for me in terms of living an internally authentic life. He didn't know how.
Lets at least agree to be open to other possibilities, and be a lawyer with as much authenticity and integrity as possible. I have plenty of good examples of lawyers that I admire - Barack Obama being one of them. I am going to use him as a role model. His coolness. Calmness. His ability to see all sides and appreciate all viewpoints. So I will practice law to the best of my ability and do my best to release all this angst inside.
I just have to tell myself this: I am not what I do. I am not a lawyer. I am a divine, spiritual, infinite being, who happens to be wearing the mask of a lawyer to get money and support my family. I am not what I do. I don't want to identify with being a lawyer.
Yes, there are parts of it that I like. The flexible schedules. The easy money. The variety of being able to move around from place to place and not be trapped in a cublicle. Meeting different people.
And yes, there are parts I don't like. The deep feeling of unease and nervousness that comes from worrying about messing up a case and getting sued. Dealing with people who are really low, depressed, and refuse to be responsible for their lives. Representing people that I would like to see behind bars forever. Feeling like I have to separate my values from my work.
Last night and today, I am feeling really crumby about being a lawyer. It all stems from feeling like I "sold out" when I got out of law school, and carrying that thought around with me all of these years. Juicing, and asking all these blasted questions all the time, has brought up these old feelings.
I am not a sell out.
Yes you are.
No I am not.
Yes you are. You gave up on living your dreams so you could be a stinking attorney swimming around like a gutter shark.
I did not. Being a lawyer has brought me profound blessings, including an amazing, diverse, world family, and the ability to do all kinds of personal growth things that I normally would never have been able to afford.
Can't you have all that without being a lawyer?
I wouldn't be where I am, with my wife, my children, my personal growth, my spiritual life, all the creative stuff I have done. There is no more inherent virtue in being a waiter than there is in being a lawyer. Plus, I have tried (and I will continue to try) to create more books and more audios to hopefully give me the freedom to give it up.
Give it up now.
No. That would be ridiculous, irresponsible. I cannot support a family of 7 without an attorneys salary -and even with an attorneys salary, I will be strapped at times. My life purpose is to raise these amazing children. You young, naive 26 year old, you don't realize so many things. You didn't sell out. You went down the stream. There are no accidents. I have the gift of hindsight, and you have the burning, angry idealism - with no vision whatsoever. There is nothing wrong with being a lawyer.
Bullshit.
Your impossible. But that's okay. I forgive you. I forgive the thought, and the feeling, that you have, of selling out. Look at where we are at now. We have such an amazing life - filled with so much incredible joy. There is no way you could have predicted, or even planned, the amazingly beautiful like we have now. Things turned out, and continue to unfold, perfectly, can't you see? You need to stop resenting me. I have a lot more experience now, and I have done a lot of healing work, with much more to day. And I can see that there are no accidents. There are no mistakes. We are right where we need to be. And yes, I would love to find something to replace the law that has the same pay and flexibility and benefits. Do you have any ideas, young idealistic man?
Okay, well maybe being a gutter, slime-ball attorney has brought you many benefits. And perhaps the profession isn't all bad. All lawyers aren't scum-bags. I got so ugly, disenchanted, cynical, about the whole legal system and legal profession in my third year of law school, and I never really resolved that conflict. But I have to feel and be who I am. I have to live authentically, but I don't know how to go about doing that. Dad never set a really great example for me in terms of living an internally authentic life. He didn't know how.
Lets at least agree to be open to other possibilities, and be a lawyer with as much authenticity and integrity as possible. I have plenty of good examples of lawyers that I admire - Barack Obama being one of them. I am going to use him as a role model. His coolness. Calmness. His ability to see all sides and appreciate all viewpoints. So I will practice law to the best of my ability and do my best to release all this angst inside.
Wednesday, January 28, 2009
Bathing belly fat in vibrations of Love
I just stepped out of Court and did 2 minutes of fire breathing. I also held my hands gently on both sides of my belly. During my breathing, I could feel my hands vibrating and tingling with energy. I consciously directed Universal Energy and Love into all my fat cells, and felt really good afterward.
I am still feeling the effects of the Acai Berry juice, which is a really clear headed feeling. I love it. I wish I had been adding Acai to my protocol so far. I feel so much energy tingling and popping from my fingertips.
I continue to reflect the 108 Infinite Beingness Questions into my mind and body, and I am feeling more awake by the moment.
I haven't felt hungry today, even though I still drink raw blended juice every day.
I am still feeling the effects of the Acai Berry juice, which is a really clear headed feeling. I love it. I wish I had been adding Acai to my protocol so far. I feel so much energy tingling and popping from my fingertips.
I continue to reflect the 108 Infinite Beingness Questions into my mind and body, and I am feeling more awake by the moment.
I haven't felt hungry today, even though I still drink raw blended juice every day.
Day 17 - belly fat and fire breathing
Today, I added a highly concentrated form of Acai Juice to the mix of my daily dose of raw blended vegetables, and I feel really clear headed and fantastic. I feel tons of energy on all levels of my mind and body. Every part of me feels ignited with energy. I feel really fantastic about myself.
Yesterday, and also this morning, I felt over-gorged on raw blended juice. I didn't want to juice this morning, just because of the manual labor part of it. Also, I mixed up less juice today, so I don't feel like my circuits are burning out on green fire!
Right now, I feel really awesome.
I couple of things I am adding to my routine:
1. I am going to do 2 minutes of fire breathing at least 6 times a day. Fire breathing is when you breathe in and out really fast for short intervals. There is more to it than that, but that is the jist of it. What I do, is breathe in and out of my nose or my mouth, while I tighten my abs. As I breathe rapidly, I contract and relax my abs, which is giving me a core workout 6 times a day. I am doing this to:
a. Increase my metabolism,
b. Workout my abs and start shrinking my belly fat,
c. Increase my vibration of love.
2. Of course, the Acai juice. I think that has already made a difference for me.
3. A high-frequency recording of the 108 questions. This is called "silent subliminal" and it is the questions recorded and then transformed into high-frequencies that only the inner ear and the subconscious mind can pick up. When it is playing, it is totally silent, except for a high-pitched scratchy sound that you really have to strain to hear. I played it last night while we slept, and then when I actually listened to the regular version, the questions had a much more powerful feel to them. I felt more absorbed.
4. Belly fat. I am going to start placing my hands on each side of my belly, breathing deeply, and channeling Universal Love and Life Force Energy into my belly fat. This is a way for me to begin to forgive and release the thoughts that I am holding in my consciousness that is causing the belly fat. I am also beginning to clearly see the reasons that I have gained my belly over the last 10 to 13 years.
a. One proposed reason: When I became a lawyer, I had only the intention of doing it for a few months. I hated the law, and I hated everything about the prospect of practicing law. haha. My dad plopped 7500.00 down on the bed and handed it to me in cash. Being a poor and broke student for so long, I had never seen that much money in my whole life, much less held it in my hand. So, I blew it in one weekend. Plus, the person my dad got all that cash from was a really dangerous, mean, angry looking criminal, so I felt slimy. Then those three months turned into 6 months, turned into a few years. I always felt like I "sold" my highest ideals for 7500.00 of drug money, and so eating lots and lots of food became a way to bury that guilt.
Looking back, with the power of hindsight, I see that everything happens for a reason. Practicing law has brought me immense personal and financial benefits. I was able to do things that I wouldn't be able to do on a waiters salary. Being a lawyer has enabled me to meet my beautiful wife, and being a lawyer has provided us with the abundance to adopt two incredibly beautiful boys from abroad, and being a lawyer is bringing yet another daughter home from Ethiopia (hopefully this year). So, it has all been a blessing.
I still feel like there are parts of the law that I cannot stand, and still, it does feel like a compromise for me. There are times that I have to do things, say things, represent certain people, that really makes my skin crawl. I deal alot with people who don't care about there lives, and then when their case goes south (because of their actions) they blame me.
I would desperately like to have a vocation that truly reflects my deepest values. The law isn't it, yet it is enabling me to do the things that are in alignment with my deepest values. I have written numerous books, recorded tons of audios, and experienced many awesome retreats - all because of the financial abundance that the practice of law brought me.
Even with all that, the thought is still there, and I recognize that I have been burying the guilt of "selling out" with food for 14 years. I am not a sell out, I am a good, loving, responsible, creative, and spiritual human being who happens to practice law to make a living. (For the moment, anyway)
b. Another proposed reason. Back in 1995 I was really getting to the core of some childhood abuse issues, and experiencing some really, genuine breakthroughs. At that point, I went to a Rolpher, who sexually abused me on the massage table. I was in a vulnerable position, and he did some really weird stuff to me. I quit going, but the trust between me and the pain I was connecting with, was completely severed. That is when I really started to eat a ton of chicken fried steak and mashed potatoes, because I was emotionally freaked out.
All of this stuff is in my belly fat, and it is time to emotionally let got of these thoughts that I am holding in my belly. For the whole 8 years of marriage with my wife, I have had this bulging belly. It has been a third companion in our marriage, and I have made many jokes about it, sticking it out, laughing about it. I have become identified with this excess fat on my midsection. I have tried many times to get rid of it, but it always comes back, because of this reason:
To be fat is to be safe. Fat is a really wonderful thing to hide behind.
Until I heal the thoughts that I am holding in my belly, I will have this belly for a really, really long time. And belly fat is extremely toxic. It is like carrying around a landfill on my body. All sorts of ugly, dangerous, nasty chemicals come out of that area of my body.
This is why I am going to begin to daily hold my hands gently on my belly, breathe deeply and continuously, and pour the light of pure love into all that fat. It is time to consciously let go of Mr. Belly. He needs to move on.
Yesterday, and also this morning, I felt over-gorged on raw blended juice. I didn't want to juice this morning, just because of the manual labor part of it. Also, I mixed up less juice today, so I don't feel like my circuits are burning out on green fire!
Right now, I feel really awesome.
I couple of things I am adding to my routine:
1. I am going to do 2 minutes of fire breathing at least 6 times a day. Fire breathing is when you breathe in and out really fast for short intervals. There is more to it than that, but that is the jist of it. What I do, is breathe in and out of my nose or my mouth, while I tighten my abs. As I breathe rapidly, I contract and relax my abs, which is giving me a core workout 6 times a day. I am doing this to:
a. Increase my metabolism,
b. Workout my abs and start shrinking my belly fat,
c. Increase my vibration of love.
2. Of course, the Acai juice. I think that has already made a difference for me.
3. A high-frequency recording of the 108 questions. This is called "silent subliminal" and it is the questions recorded and then transformed into high-frequencies that only the inner ear and the subconscious mind can pick up. When it is playing, it is totally silent, except for a high-pitched scratchy sound that you really have to strain to hear. I played it last night while we slept, and then when I actually listened to the regular version, the questions had a much more powerful feel to them. I felt more absorbed.
4. Belly fat. I am going to start placing my hands on each side of my belly, breathing deeply, and channeling Universal Love and Life Force Energy into my belly fat. This is a way for me to begin to forgive and release the thoughts that I am holding in my consciousness that is causing the belly fat. I am also beginning to clearly see the reasons that I have gained my belly over the last 10 to 13 years.
a. One proposed reason: When I became a lawyer, I had only the intention of doing it for a few months. I hated the law, and I hated everything about the prospect of practicing law. haha. My dad plopped 7500.00 down on the bed and handed it to me in cash. Being a poor and broke student for so long, I had never seen that much money in my whole life, much less held it in my hand. So, I blew it in one weekend. Plus, the person my dad got all that cash from was a really dangerous, mean, angry looking criminal, so I felt slimy. Then those three months turned into 6 months, turned into a few years. I always felt like I "sold" my highest ideals for 7500.00 of drug money, and so eating lots and lots of food became a way to bury that guilt.
Looking back, with the power of hindsight, I see that everything happens for a reason. Practicing law has brought me immense personal and financial benefits. I was able to do things that I wouldn't be able to do on a waiters salary. Being a lawyer has enabled me to meet my beautiful wife, and being a lawyer has provided us with the abundance to adopt two incredibly beautiful boys from abroad, and being a lawyer is bringing yet another daughter home from Ethiopia (hopefully this year). So, it has all been a blessing.
I still feel like there are parts of the law that I cannot stand, and still, it does feel like a compromise for me. There are times that I have to do things, say things, represent certain people, that really makes my skin crawl. I deal alot with people who don't care about there lives, and then when their case goes south (because of their actions) they blame me.
I would desperately like to have a vocation that truly reflects my deepest values. The law isn't it, yet it is enabling me to do the things that are in alignment with my deepest values. I have written numerous books, recorded tons of audios, and experienced many awesome retreats - all because of the financial abundance that the practice of law brought me.
Even with all that, the thought is still there, and I recognize that I have been burying the guilt of "selling out" with food for 14 years. I am not a sell out, I am a good, loving, responsible, creative, and spiritual human being who happens to practice law to make a living. (For the moment, anyway)
b. Another proposed reason. Back in 1995 I was really getting to the core of some childhood abuse issues, and experiencing some really, genuine breakthroughs. At that point, I went to a Rolpher, who sexually abused me on the massage table. I was in a vulnerable position, and he did some really weird stuff to me. I quit going, but the trust between me and the pain I was connecting with, was completely severed. That is when I really started to eat a ton of chicken fried steak and mashed potatoes, because I was emotionally freaked out.
All of this stuff is in my belly fat, and it is time to emotionally let got of these thoughts that I am holding in my belly. For the whole 8 years of marriage with my wife, I have had this bulging belly. It has been a third companion in our marriage, and I have made many jokes about it, sticking it out, laughing about it. I have become identified with this excess fat on my midsection. I have tried many times to get rid of it, but it always comes back, because of this reason:
To be fat is to be safe. Fat is a really wonderful thing to hide behind.
Until I heal the thoughts that I am holding in my belly, I will have this belly for a really, really long time. And belly fat is extremely toxic. It is like carrying around a landfill on my body. All sorts of ugly, dangerous, nasty chemicals come out of that area of my body.
This is why I am going to begin to daily hold my hands gently on my belly, breathe deeply and continuously, and pour the light of pure love into all that fat. It is time to consciously let go of Mr. Belly. He needs to move on.
Monday, January 26, 2009
Back to work on day 15
I am doing really well on day 15 of this blended juice journey. A part of me is sitting back and wondering how long I can hold out without eating any solid food. I am feeling really good, and my weight loss seems to be somewhat stalled at 6 pound weight lloss so far. This is good news to me because I believe it is healthier and more sustainable to lose weight more slowly.
Anyway, yesterday I was really tired and lethargicc, but I thinks that had a lot to do with emotional issues that are coming up. Today, I have been able to identify those old issues that have been with me for a long time, and now I am feeling much better and more energized.
Anyway, yesterday I was really tired and lethargicc, but I thinks that had a lot to do with emotional issues that are coming up. Today, I have been able to identify those old issues that have been with me for a long time, and now I am feeling much better and more energized.
Sunday, January 25, 2009
feeling tired and lethargic
I am feeling really tired and lethargic today. I have some emotions and "stuff" within me that I cannot put a finger on, cannot identify. I just know that I am not feeling really good at all. It is uncomfortable. I just had a protein drink, which has really helped out a lot.
Infinite Beingness Questions
This is day 3 of listening to the Questions as I fall asleep at night. And I am having much more amazing dreams, although I can't remember them. I am also still feeling them being repeated and reflected unconsciously.
Day 14 of Raw Blended juices
I am doing GREAT on my juicing journey. Last night, I had a bowl of lentil/vegetable soup and a glass of mango juice at the India Palace with my wife, Christine. It was fabulous. This morning, I woke up and grinded up a days worth of juice. And now I am feeling clear, happy, and relaxed!
12 Minutes of running Love
My hands feel cool and light after I just spent another 12 minutes breathing deeply and funneling Love/Universal Energy through my heart and hands - and into my Heart-Based Network book. It feels like a cool, smooth, clear river flowing through me. As I write, I am continuing to breath, and feel these tingling vibrations course through my heart, arms, hands, and fingers.
It is so easy for me - as it has been my pattern - to bring through an incredible idea, and to work on it feverishly for a time, and then when I don't see immediate results, to give up and move onto something else.
The Heart-Based Network is an idea that I am not going to give up on. When I channel Love into the pages of this book, and into the photographs of my family and friends who are contained there, and into the future people who will be within its pages, I don't see immediate results. I feel the results as waves of tingling energy and tears that come down my face. In my heart, I know that the Love I am directing through me is having a positive impact on the world.
And I know that every single human being on the planet has the potential to awaken the awesome force of Love within them.
It is so easy for me - as it has been my pattern - to bring through an incredible idea, and to work on it feverishly for a time, and then when I don't see immediate results, to give up and move onto something else.
The Heart-Based Network is an idea that I am not going to give up on. When I channel Love into the pages of this book, and into the photographs of my family and friends who are contained there, and into the future people who will be within its pages, I don't see immediate results. I feel the results as waves of tingling energy and tears that come down my face. In my heart, I know that the Love I am directing through me is having a positive impact on the world.
And I know that every single human being on the planet has the potential to awaken the awesome force of Love within them.
Saturday, January 24, 2009
12 Minutes of transmitting Universal Love
I just sat and transmitted Universal Love through my hearts and hands, and into the pages of The Heart-Based Network.
What I do is "breathe" open my heart and expand it into the Universe, and then allow Love/Energy to flow back through me. As I breathe in, my heart opens, expands, and rises. As I breathe out, I allow Love to flow through my open heart and relaxed hands... and into the pages of my book... and into everyone who is now, or will be, contained within the pages.
For me, the pages of this book is Love-Charged Quantum Space. When I send Love into it, that Love flows to all who will ever be contained within it, now or in the future.
As I transmitted Love, I felt my heart melt into tears. My mind traveled to India, and more specifically, to Mumbai. I saw all the millions of children in the slums, living on the streets, and I thought of them. I thought of how beautiful they are, just like my Indian son Andrew. There were tens of millions just like them. I sent every single one of this children Love, and I imagined what big dreams they must have.
I thought of there being a school for the poorest of the poor of India's children to be educated, brought out of poverty, going to great schools, then contributing to ending the slums.
As I continued to breathe deeply and pour Love through me, I saw millions and millions of diamonds. India is a diamond-mine field of beautiful children. May the Love that I, and others, send into The HBN, reach them and help them in even the smallest of ways.
I will say this: We all under-estimate the power we all have of using our Love to impact the world.
What I do is "breathe" open my heart and expand it into the Universe, and then allow Love/Energy to flow back through me. As I breathe in, my heart opens, expands, and rises. As I breathe out, I allow Love to flow through my open heart and relaxed hands... and into the pages of my book... and into everyone who is now, or will be, contained within the pages.
For me, the pages of this book is Love-Charged Quantum Space. When I send Love into it, that Love flows to all who will ever be contained within it, now or in the future.
As I transmitted Love, I felt my heart melt into tears. My mind traveled to India, and more specifically, to Mumbai. I saw all the millions of children in the slums, living on the streets, and I thought of them. I thought of how beautiful they are, just like my Indian son Andrew. There were tens of millions just like them. I sent every single one of this children Love, and I imagined what big dreams they must have.
I thought of there being a school for the poorest of the poor of India's children to be educated, brought out of poverty, going to great schools, then contributing to ending the slums.
As I continued to breathe deeply and pour Love through me, I saw millions and millions of diamonds. India is a diamond-mine field of beautiful children. May the Love that I, and others, send into The HBN, reach them and help them in even the smallest of ways.
I will say this: We all under-estimate the power we all have of using our Love to impact the world.
It would be easy to quit
I am noticing that it would be easy to just eat a plate of rice tonight. After all, what would a plate of rice hurt, huh? Well, that is the thinking that totally throws me off, and the effects of that one decision will last a long time.
For instance, on Thanksgiving of 2007 I said to myself: "I am going to allow myself the permission to gorge, because its just one day."
Over a year later, I am still regretting that decision, because I am a compulsive eater. I am an addictive eater. If I eat just one thing, it will start a chain reaction that will be the end of it for me.
I am also a recovering alcoholic and drug addict, clean and sober for over 20 years, and I know that it just takes one time do end it.
No.
No rice for me tonight. I will eat soup tonight, and I will stay on this fantastic path of health, clarity, vitality, and joy!
For instance, on Thanksgiving of 2007 I said to myself: "I am going to allow myself the permission to gorge, because its just one day."
Over a year later, I am still regretting that decision, because I am a compulsive eater. I am an addictive eater. If I eat just one thing, it will start a chain reaction that will be the end of it for me.
I am also a recovering alcoholic and drug addict, clean and sober for over 20 years, and I know that it just takes one time do end it.
No.
No rice for me tonight. I will eat soup tonight, and I will stay on this fantastic path of health, clarity, vitality, and joy!
108 Questions dominating my unconscious
After just two days of listening to my 108 Infinite Beingness Questions as I fall asleep at night, and as I am waking up in the morning, I am beginning to feel that they are dominating my unconscious thought process.
I can just feel them continuing to be asked, repeated, and reflected in my unconscious mind. I am going to keep this up.
I can just feel them continuing to be asked, repeated, and reflected in my unconscious mind. I am going to keep this up.
Three beautiful insights
After taking a bath today, I experienced three clear, kean insights about myself:
1. Carrying around an extra 20 pounds of body weight weighs down the mind, and has been a direct impediment to me reaching my grand visions and goals that I have set for myself.
2. When I clear out excess body weight, by washing out the toxic build up in my cells by bombarding them with raw blended vegetable juice, my mind clears. There is such am amazing connection between the mind and body. In reality, they are one.
3. This one just came: On top of clearing out my cells and atoms with powerful juices, I need to send Universal Love cascading ecstatically through them as well. Love purifies the extender of love.
1. Carrying around an extra 20 pounds of body weight weighs down the mind, and has been a direct impediment to me reaching my grand visions and goals that I have set for myself.
2. When I clear out excess body weight, by washing out the toxic build up in my cells by bombarding them with raw blended vegetable juice, my mind clears. There is such am amazing connection between the mind and body. In reality, they are one.
3. This one just came: On top of clearing out my cells and atoms with powerful juices, I need to send Universal Love cascading ecstatically through them as well. Love purifies the extender of love.
The Heart-Based Network - extending Universal Love
Since 1995 I have been enthralled and fascinated with energy-therapy modalities, like Reiki, etc.
Reiki is a Japanese term that means "Universal Life Force Energy," and the system of Reiki was re-discovered by a man by the name of Dr. Usui from Japan. The ability to transmit healing energy from one person to the next is very ancient, and very real. I believe it is totally hard-wired into my energetic intelligence.
After 13 years of doing Reiki off and on, and of recently learning Quantum Touch, (which is a system of focusing the energy by tying into the movement of the breath), I created and wrote a book called The Heart-Based Network.
This a book where we collect the photos and intentions of other people in the 144 blank, empty pages at the end of the book. The first 50 or 60 pages contains a 6 step system for joining minds with others and opening ourselves to the flow of Universal Love. Each step is a creative relaxation exercise that helps us relax into the flow of Love.
The practice, ultimately, is to take at least 12 minutes a day, sandwich the book between our hands and flood this Energy/Love/Light through our hands and into the photographs and intentions of everyone who is, or will be, contained within the pages. I believe that this book can help connect and heal people from the illusion of separation, all through the invisible power of Universal Love/Life Force Energy.
It's kind of like an advanced, quantum book of prayer. But more than prayer, we are actually extending Universal Love through our hearts and hands, and in so doing, communing in the bliss and joy of that Love.
I realize that I need to add this to the mixture of what I am doing in this blog. I need to extend Love through my hands for at least 12 minutes a day, along with the juicing/blending, and along with the 108 Questions.
Reiki is a Japanese term that means "Universal Life Force Energy," and the system of Reiki was re-discovered by a man by the name of Dr. Usui from Japan. The ability to transmit healing energy from one person to the next is very ancient, and very real. I believe it is totally hard-wired into my energetic intelligence.
After 13 years of doing Reiki off and on, and of recently learning Quantum Touch, (which is a system of focusing the energy by tying into the movement of the breath), I created and wrote a book called The Heart-Based Network.
This a book where we collect the photos and intentions of other people in the 144 blank, empty pages at the end of the book. The first 50 or 60 pages contains a 6 step system for joining minds with others and opening ourselves to the flow of Universal Love. Each step is a creative relaxation exercise that helps us relax into the flow of Love.
The practice, ultimately, is to take at least 12 minutes a day, sandwich the book between our hands and flood this Energy/Love/Light through our hands and into the photographs and intentions of everyone who is, or will be, contained within the pages. I believe that this book can help connect and heal people from the illusion of separation, all through the invisible power of Universal Love/Life Force Energy.
It's kind of like an advanced, quantum book of prayer. But more than prayer, we are actually extending Universal Love through our hearts and hands, and in so doing, communing in the bliss and joy of that Love.
I realize that I need to add this to the mixture of what I am doing in this blog. I need to extend Love through my hands for at least 12 minutes a day, along with the juicing/blending, and along with the 108 Questions.
Day 13 - Drinking Creamy Pixie-Mate
I am feeling good today, after a much needed long night of sleep. Sorin and Liam went to their Dad's house this weekend, so we are left with Sky and Andrew. This means nice long sleep and much less work.
Yesterday I was exhausted the entire day. It was hard to keep my eyes open.
Now it is a cold Saturday morning. It is sunny outside, but very chilly.
Last night I used my I-phone to listen to the 108 Infinite Beingness Questions, and I found that it did have a profound impact on my dreams. I might mix in a "delta sleep pattern" of binaural beats to help my mind relax, and then listen to that one tonight. I also listened to it on a very low volume. And so tonight, I may listen at a higher volume.
I am also having lots of thoughts about eating solid food. Christine wants to go to the Indian Palace tonight to eat, and Indian food is a huge, huge temptation for me. If I can survive the Indian restaurant without eating, then I could go a hundred years without solid food. This morning, I also found out that I am losing weight at a much slower pace than before, which means that my weight loss is healthier and more sustainable, which makes me happy. Losing weight too fast isn't good.
My prayer for today:
I will get all the way through this day 13 of my 92 day journey of consuming nothing but raw, blended fruits, vegetables, and soups. I will complete this day. Drawing upon all the higher resources of my mind, body, and spirit, I will get through this day - and in so doing - I will get through the rest of these 92 days. I am committed to this from the core of my being. I am also committed to resting as the infinite joy, peace, and love that I am. I am committed to releasing into the beingness that I am, the beingness that transcends name, thought, form, and emotion. I am committed to my own freedom.
Yesterday I was exhausted the entire day. It was hard to keep my eyes open.
Now it is a cold Saturday morning. It is sunny outside, but very chilly.
Last night I used my I-phone to listen to the 108 Infinite Beingness Questions, and I found that it did have a profound impact on my dreams. I might mix in a "delta sleep pattern" of binaural beats to help my mind relax, and then listen to that one tonight. I also listened to it on a very low volume. And so tonight, I may listen at a higher volume.
I am also having lots of thoughts about eating solid food. Christine wants to go to the Indian Palace tonight to eat, and Indian food is a huge, huge temptation for me. If I can survive the Indian restaurant without eating, then I could go a hundred years without solid food. This morning, I also found out that I am losing weight at a much slower pace than before, which means that my weight loss is healthier and more sustainable, which makes me happy. Losing weight too fast isn't good.
My prayer for today:
I will get all the way through this day 13 of my 92 day journey of consuming nothing but raw, blended fruits, vegetables, and soups. I will complete this day. Drawing upon all the higher resources of my mind, body, and spirit, I will get through this day - and in so doing - I will get through the rest of these 92 days. I am committed to this from the core of my being. I am also committed to resting as the infinite joy, peace, and love that I am. I am committed to releasing into the beingness that I am, the beingness that transcends name, thought, form, and emotion. I am committed to my own freedom.
Friday, January 23, 2009
Day 12: Tired
On this day, I am feeling really wiped out, because I didn't get as much sleep last night. I am still drinking my delicious juice, and I feel really good about that. My consciousness is still expanding, and I am more easily about to rest in my beingness.
Thursday, January 22, 2009
Day 11 - Glory be.
This is a wonderful, fantastic, beautiful day! I walked three miles through downtown, enjoying 60 degree weather. Today I am feeling clear, energized, fantastic, and very well balanced.
Last night: Pizza was made, and the smells hit me really hard. I had to light two incenses, and put Rose Oil under my nose. My mental resolve felt like it was melting like butter in a microwave. After a bowl of butternut squash soup and two fruit smoothies, I made it to the end of the night. Success was mine, yet hard earned last night.
This morning: The clarity in my mind and body reached new heights and deeper levels. I am beginning to feel my "energy body," what some people call the "etheric body." I am feeling like I can start seeing and feeling it. I can be resting my physical hands on my lap, but then lift my energetic hands with my thoughts and move them around. I am beginning to see, to sense, and to feel more strongly this energetic, spiritual light body more profoundly, and this is a really wonderful benefit.
The Questions:
Today, I set up my stereo next to my bed, and listened to the audio of the 108 Infinite Beingness Questions while going into a deeper and deeper state of relaxation. It was awesome. I had meant to begin "listening myself to sleep" at night and "listening myself awake" first thing in the morning, but I didn't get to setting up my CD player until today. I will start tonight. Promise. Only thing that concerns me is that when I lay on my back and get into a relaxed state, I snore, which wakes Christine up. Perhaps tonight I will prop myself up.
The juice:
It took a half hour to blend up a 3/4 days worth of juice:
~brocccoli
~cauliflower
~collard greens
~kale
~red chard
~dandelion greens
~apple
~pear
~cabbage
~apple juice and soy milk
~powerful green powder
~hemp oil
Adding the soy milk makes it creamy and delicious!!
I also took a multivitamin 2 times today, plus two green tea pills, which is giving me a nice clear energy buzz today.
On comes the evening, now, with the smells and the kids and the commotion. May the Gods of Red Chard and Collard Greens protect me!!
Last night: Pizza was made, and the smells hit me really hard. I had to light two incenses, and put Rose Oil under my nose. My mental resolve felt like it was melting like butter in a microwave. After a bowl of butternut squash soup and two fruit smoothies, I made it to the end of the night. Success was mine, yet hard earned last night.
This morning: The clarity in my mind and body reached new heights and deeper levels. I am beginning to feel my "energy body," what some people call the "etheric body." I am feeling like I can start seeing and feeling it. I can be resting my physical hands on my lap, but then lift my energetic hands with my thoughts and move them around. I am beginning to see, to sense, and to feel more strongly this energetic, spiritual light body more profoundly, and this is a really wonderful benefit.
The Questions:
Today, I set up my stereo next to my bed, and listened to the audio of the 108 Infinite Beingness Questions while going into a deeper and deeper state of relaxation. It was awesome. I had meant to begin "listening myself to sleep" at night and "listening myself awake" first thing in the morning, but I didn't get to setting up my CD player until today. I will start tonight. Promise. Only thing that concerns me is that when I lay on my back and get into a relaxed state, I snore, which wakes Christine up. Perhaps tonight I will prop myself up.
The juice:
It took a half hour to blend up a 3/4 days worth of juice:
~brocccoli
~cauliflower
~collard greens
~kale
~red chard
~dandelion greens
~apple
~pear
~cabbage
~apple juice and soy milk
~powerful green powder
~hemp oil
Adding the soy milk makes it creamy and delicious!!
I also took a multivitamin 2 times today, plus two green tea pills, which is giving me a nice clear energy buzz today.
On comes the evening, now, with the smells and the kids and the commotion. May the Gods of Red Chard and Collard Greens protect me!!
Wednesday, January 21, 2009
Welcome back, Mr. Clarity - Day 10
It is day 10 and I am feeling much more clear, so clear that I really don't know what to do with my insights and perceptions. They are coming in faster than I can really process. I don't really know how many of them are accurate.
Dreams:
My dreams last night were vivid and science-fiction-ist. I had a dream of being in some kind of space-ship that collided with time and space. It wasn't a physical collision, but an energetic one, and there were these weird sparks.... hmm..
I also dreamed that scientists finally figured out that this whole world was a product of mass psychosis. And they came up with these drugs to wake up from only parts of the dream we didn't like, and stay in the parts of the dream we did like. Strange.
My state of consciousness:
I feel like I can almost see my thoughts. They are like flies swarming around in my head, and I can see through the swarm. It is very clear outside this swarm.
I am also witnessing the swarm of thought-flies from that place of clarity outside them. It is really wild. There are so many thousands of them, all swarming in and out so fast. This is a very fascinating observation. I love it.
My juicing:
Last night was not as difficult as the night before. Christine and I stayed up and watched two segments of our adoption video class, and we both scored a 100 percent on both tests. I juiced all day yesterday.
My kids both wanted a green-drink, and I at first said no, then Christine nudged me, and I then made another green blended blast of raw vegetables. Sky and Andrew are both expecting their daily dose of raw vegetables, so that is also keeping me motivated.
The labor part of it all can get a little trying. This morning it took me a half-hour, and I spread the veggies out over the whole kitchen, with no room for Christine to do much but wait. Plus, the blender is really loud. She got upset with me and told me I should grind at night.
So, the labor. Sigh. I will keep at it. This morning I am feeling fantastic. I am BOTH feeling all these thought-flies swarming through my head AND watching them from outside my head at the same time. I like it.
108 Infinite Beingness Questions:
I am also keeping at this one as well. I am going to listen to the questions every night as I fall asleep, and every morning as I wake up, to help soak them into my unconscious mind even more. I am bringing my small cd player home today for that purpose.
Dreams:
My dreams last night were vivid and science-fiction-ist. I had a dream of being in some kind of space-ship that collided with time and space. It wasn't a physical collision, but an energetic one, and there were these weird sparks.... hmm..
I also dreamed that scientists finally figured out that this whole world was a product of mass psychosis. And they came up with these drugs to wake up from only parts of the dream we didn't like, and stay in the parts of the dream we did like. Strange.
My state of consciousness:
I feel like I can almost see my thoughts. They are like flies swarming around in my head, and I can see through the swarm. It is very clear outside this swarm.
I am also witnessing the swarm of thought-flies from that place of clarity outside them. It is really wild. There are so many thousands of them, all swarming in and out so fast. This is a very fascinating observation. I love it.
My juicing:
Last night was not as difficult as the night before. Christine and I stayed up and watched two segments of our adoption video class, and we both scored a 100 percent on both tests. I juiced all day yesterday.
My kids both wanted a green-drink, and I at first said no, then Christine nudged me, and I then made another green blended blast of raw vegetables. Sky and Andrew are both expecting their daily dose of raw vegetables, so that is also keeping me motivated.
The labor part of it all can get a little trying. This morning it took me a half-hour, and I spread the veggies out over the whole kitchen, with no room for Christine to do much but wait. Plus, the blender is really loud. She got upset with me and told me I should grind at night.
So, the labor. Sigh. I will keep at it. This morning I am feeling fantastic. I am BOTH feeling all these thought-flies swarming through my head AND watching them from outside my head at the same time. I like it.
108 Infinite Beingness Questions:
I am also keeping at this one as well. I am going to listen to the questions every night as I fall asleep, and every morning as I wake up, to help soak them into my unconscious mind even more. I am bringing my small cd player home today for that purpose.
Tuesday, January 20, 2009
Emotional Freedom Techniques Prayer
I am going to start using Emotional Freedom Techniques a lot more throughout the rest of this life-long journey I am on, especially in helping me weather this oceanic journey of being on a juice-blended journey for the remainder of this 92 day period. I will stay in day 9, in this moment of day 9, knowing that if I complete day 9, then I have already completed day 92.
Day 9 and Day 92 are BOTH TODAY!!!!!! It is always today. It is always right now. This is the key to long-term success. Whatever I am feeling, whether lethargic, cranky, tired, IT WILL PASS. I know that it is temporary.
EFT is a system of using your fingertips to "tap" on various acupressure points along the body to remove and collapse uncomfortable and painful emotions. It is really powerful.
I am going to use the "basic recipe" of EFT every day. I am going to tap on my acupressure points while repeating this powerful prayer:
"In this moment, on this day, I am grateful and overflowing with joy to now deepen my resolve and my commitment to complete this 92 day journey of drinking nothing but raw blended vegetables, fruit juices, and soups. I do this one day, one hour, one moment at a time. I will stay in this perfect, eternal, present moment. Right now, I have completed my 92 day journey as a springboard to a life-long journey of health and abundance, because it is always today. And I now release and collapse all thoughts and emotions to the contrary."
I believe that, as I repeat the above prayer and tap on my acupressure points, I am activating my spiritual and energetic intelligence to provide me with the inner resources to make it all the way.
However, day 92 is just the beginning.
Day 9 and Day 92 are BOTH TODAY!!!!!! It is always today. It is always right now. This is the key to long-term success. Whatever I am feeling, whether lethargic, cranky, tired, IT WILL PASS. I know that it is temporary.
EFT is a system of using your fingertips to "tap" on various acupressure points along the body to remove and collapse uncomfortable and painful emotions. It is really powerful.
I am going to use the "basic recipe" of EFT every day. I am going to tap on my acupressure points while repeating this powerful prayer:
"In this moment, on this day, I am grateful and overflowing with joy to now deepen my resolve and my commitment to complete this 92 day journey of drinking nothing but raw blended vegetables, fruit juices, and soups. I do this one day, one hour, one moment at a time. I will stay in this perfect, eternal, present moment. Right now, I have completed my 92 day journey as a springboard to a life-long journey of health and abundance, because it is always today. And I now release and collapse all thoughts and emotions to the contrary."
I believe that, as I repeat the above prayer and tap on my acupressure points, I am activating my spiritual and energetic intelligence to provide me with the inner resources to make it all the way.
However, day 92 is just the beginning.
Week two recap (day 9 and day 20)
It is now day 9 of an all-raw, blended vegetable and fruit juice journey, and day 20 of a year long journey of practicing the holographic meditation and releasing the 108 Infinite Beingness Questions into my body, heart, mind, and soul. I am finding out, early on, that the two journeys are becoming one journey.
It started out with me making a commitment to ask these 108 questions every day for the year 2009. I started out doing that, and everything went well. Then on Sunday January 11, 2009, with an acid-filled bloated gut, I spontaneously decided to do a 7 day juice fast. I was sick and tired of always feeling full, of being 20 pounds overweight, and of feeling heavy all the time.
As I began to go through the first four days, and after reading about people who drink nothing but juice for 92 days or more, I decided to go the distance. The first week was a dream. I felt clear, light, positive, full of laughter, smiles, joy. I didn’t feel any hunger pains. The level of clarity that I was experiencing was really wonderful.
I am not putting my veggies through a juicer. I am chopping them up, mixing them with apple juice, water, sometimes some soy milk and hemp oil, and then blending them up in a regular blender. I am getting all the fiber and all the juice.
I realize now, how powerful a tool it is to clear out the cells of my body. As I clear out my cells, my consciousness is more receptive to waking up with the release of these 108 questions. This is a combined journey, a two step process of transforming my consciousness:
1. Juice up a storm, and
2. Ask the 108 Infinite Beingness questions and practice the holographic meditation.
It is now week two, and I am beginning to feel more agitated, tired, cranky, and more snappy with those around me. Every day I feel really awesome during the day, and every evening I am beginning to feel more and more tired and cranky. I am hoping that this will pass. I am confident it will.
I am committed to going forward.
It started out with me making a commitment to ask these 108 questions every day for the year 2009. I started out doing that, and everything went well. Then on Sunday January 11, 2009, with an acid-filled bloated gut, I spontaneously decided to do a 7 day juice fast. I was sick and tired of always feeling full, of being 20 pounds overweight, and of feeling heavy all the time.
As I began to go through the first four days, and after reading about people who drink nothing but juice for 92 days or more, I decided to go the distance. The first week was a dream. I felt clear, light, positive, full of laughter, smiles, joy. I didn’t feel any hunger pains. The level of clarity that I was experiencing was really wonderful.
I am not putting my veggies through a juicer. I am chopping them up, mixing them with apple juice, water, sometimes some soy milk and hemp oil, and then blending them up in a regular blender. I am getting all the fiber and all the juice.
I realize now, how powerful a tool it is to clear out the cells of my body. As I clear out my cells, my consciousness is more receptive to waking up with the release of these 108 questions. This is a combined journey, a two step process of transforming my consciousness:
1. Juice up a storm, and
2. Ask the 108 Infinite Beingness questions and practice the holographic meditation.
It is now week two, and I am beginning to feel more agitated, tired, cranky, and more snappy with those around me. Every day I feel really awesome during the day, and every evening I am beginning to feel more and more tired and cranky. I am hoping that this will pass. I am confident it will.
I am committed to going forward.
Day 9 - mornings are good.
If mornings felt like evenings, I could juice forever.
Evenings are becoming harder and harder for me to keep up the Raw Juice Protocol. I am finding that my energy decreases at night, and the castle walls seem to weaken against the onslaught of smells, sights, and thoughts of food. Last night I had a small bowl of organic creamy tomato soup, and a part of me felt like I was cheating. Christine made a delicious egg-plant pasta soup, and I felt not detached from, and attracted to the food, all at the same time. Really strange.
Then, playing the "bean bag tossing game" with Sky, I found it easybfor Sky to push my buttons. He says weird nonsensical things and makes weird faces at in-opportune times just to get a reaction out of me. Last night, he was the puppet master and I was the puppet. I was feeling really annoyed with him.
Oh my god, just as I am blogging, I realized that I am describing myself. I make weird faces. I act weird at strange times. I say weird things just for the reaction. I do all of that. All Sky is doing is holding up a mirror for me to look at myself. Interesting insight, indeed. I am not annoyed at Sky at all. I am annoyed at my own mannerisms that he is reflecting back to me.
Evenings are becoming harder and harder for me to keep up the Raw Juice Protocol. I am finding that my energy decreases at night, and the castle walls seem to weaken against the onslaught of smells, sights, and thoughts of food. Last night I had a small bowl of organic creamy tomato soup, and a part of me felt like I was cheating. Christine made a delicious egg-plant pasta soup, and I felt not detached from, and attracted to the food, all at the same time. Really strange.
Then, playing the "bean bag tossing game" with Sky, I found it easybfor Sky to push my buttons. He says weird nonsensical things and makes weird faces at in-opportune times just to get a reaction out of me. Last night, he was the puppet master and I was the puppet. I was feeling really annoyed with him.
Oh my god, just as I am blogging, I realized that I am describing myself. I make weird faces. I act weird at strange times. I say weird things just for the reaction. I do all of that. All Sky is doing is holding up a mirror for me to look at myself. Interesting insight, indeed. I am not annoyed at Sky at all. I am annoyed at my own mannerisms that he is reflecting back to me.
Monday, January 19, 2009
Day 8 of Juice and Day 19 of spiritual questions
On the juice side of things:
I am feeling really good. Last night, I felt myself begin to get angry and agitated. I have this layer of anger within me that I have run into in the past when I begin to lose weight. So I have been wondering when Mr. Anger will come knocking on the door. It starts with angry thoughts that come out of nowhere - these angry thoughts that really have no basis in anything going on around me.
What these thoughts want me to do is to nurse them. They want me to feed them a baby bottle so the baby can grow really fast into a huge, snarling, drooling, angry gargoyle that wants to lash out at everyone around me.
This time, however, I didn't nurse them. I just noticed them. Noticed myself. Witnessed myself.
We watched Alfred Hitchcock presents last night, then went to bed. Toward the morning, I woke up having deeply emotional, cleansing dreams. That was really good for me.
This morning, I woke up, did some weight lifting, pushups, and squats, drank more juice, and I am feeling good. I just drank my second juice, and I am going strong.
Last night, thoughts of food crept in. I always experience a weakening of my resolve at night, and a strengthening of resolve during the day. Daytimes are much better for me.
On the spiritual side:
I am progressing steadily. Still asking the questions, and still listening to the recording. I feel like I am waking up from a dream. It feels like my real self is beginning to stretch, yawn, and open his eyes. The clarity is really wonderful.
I am feeling really good. Last night, I felt myself begin to get angry and agitated. I have this layer of anger within me that I have run into in the past when I begin to lose weight. So I have been wondering when Mr. Anger will come knocking on the door. It starts with angry thoughts that come out of nowhere - these angry thoughts that really have no basis in anything going on around me.
What these thoughts want me to do is to nurse them. They want me to feed them a baby bottle so the baby can grow really fast into a huge, snarling, drooling, angry gargoyle that wants to lash out at everyone around me.
This time, however, I didn't nurse them. I just noticed them. Noticed myself. Witnessed myself.
We watched Alfred Hitchcock presents last night, then went to bed. Toward the morning, I woke up having deeply emotional, cleansing dreams. That was really good for me.
This morning, I woke up, did some weight lifting, pushups, and squats, drank more juice, and I am feeling good. I just drank my second juice, and I am going strong.
Last night, thoughts of food crept in. I always experience a weakening of my resolve at night, and a strengthening of resolve during the day. Daytimes are much better for me.
On the spiritual side:
I am progressing steadily. Still asking the questions, and still listening to the recording. I feel like I am waking up from a dream. It feels like my real self is beginning to stretch, yawn, and open his eyes. The clarity is really wonderful.
Day 8 - Let Freedom Ring
As I write today, I am listening to Martin Luther King's "I have a Dream Speech" in my office as my Guatemalan born son, Sky, is playing on PBSkids.com. I am deeply inspired by the passion and the fire and the spirit pouring out of that man.
And in one day, my son Sky, my other Indian Son Andrew, and my "on the way" daughter from Ethiopia, Amelie Lin Peebles, will have a powerful door opened to them.
Barack Obama will be elected president. This time last year, my wife and I got on the Obama bandwagon. We put up a poster in our windows, and pasted a poster on our son's door. We were excited about caucusing for him. We were hoping, and listening, and praying.
Then - all year last year - we talked about it endlessly, prayed, gave money, volunteered, and we cheered and cried when he won.
And now it all comes together in one day!
God Speed Obama!
And in one day, my son Sky, my other Indian Son Andrew, and my "on the way" daughter from Ethiopia, Amelie Lin Peebles, will have a powerful door opened to them.
Barack Obama will be elected president. This time last year, my wife and I got on the Obama bandwagon. We put up a poster in our windows, and pasted a poster on our son's door. We were excited about caucusing for him. We were hoping, and listening, and praying.
Then - all year last year - we talked about it endlessly, prayed, gave money, volunteered, and we cheered and cried when he won.
And now it all comes together in one day!
God Speed Obama!
Sunday, January 18, 2009
What exactly am I doing? My regimen
I feel the need to completely clarify, as best I can at this point, what it is that I am doing.
I am not doing a "juice feast" as it is exactly described on http://www.juicefeasting.com/. My understanding from just reading the site, is this:
1. You actually juice the greens and vegetables through a juicer, removing the fiber from it, and drink enough whole juice to equal the same amount in calories that you would normally consume from eating solid food. You do it for 30 to 92 days.
2. You give yourself enimas, get colonics, and take other supplements.
I am sure there is a TON more information than that - but that is what I can glean from their awesome website. They are true pioneers.
First, I don't want to go through that, because of several reasons:
1. The enormous time it would take to do all that juicing. I read blogs of it taking an hour to juice all the juice that you need. Then there is clean up, prep, and all that would amount to it taking WAY TO MUCH TIME for me, a father of 4 kids, a full-time law practice, commuting at least 2 to 3 hours a day from court to court. The time involved - can't do it.
2. The enormous cost of buying all those vegetables. If I bought organic, I would be spending enormous amounts of money on vegetables alone. Organic vegetables are very expensive. Organic apples cost 5 to 6 bucks a back. What also makes the cost go up, is that it takes a lot of vegetables to make enough juice to drink over a gallon a day.
3. Dropping 300 to 500 bucks on a juicer. I am stubborn - I am not going to spend that much on a juicer so I can sit and juice, juice, juice. And, the whole vitamix thing, really makes me mad. All it is, is one huge expensive blender. Why buy a vita-mix, when my Oyster blender blends it perfectly for me? Don't get it, and I am not going to spend 500 bucks to get started, then spend ALL THAT TIME juicing vegetables and ALL THAT MONEY buying them.
For me, and speaking ONLY FOR MYSELF, that is not sustainable.
SO, here is what I have been doing for the past 6 days, and it really seems to work for me:
1. I use my 8 year old Oyster Blender.
2. I take a bunch of green leafy vegetables (so far: kale, cauliflower, cabbage, collard greens, spinach, carrots, and so far the following fruits: apples, blueberries, and pears) I shred them into smaller pieces, and I fill up my blender about half-way with different recipes and concoctions.
3. I then fill it up about half-way with organic apple juice, and then the rest of the way with Distilled Water (to not use so much apple juice). Sometimes I put in some soy milk, and some times I put in Hemp Oil and some really powerful superfood green powder.
4. Then I fill up my 20 ounce container, and drink it down.
5. I drink as much as I can during the day. I don't think I have gotten a gallon of juice down into me, but I try to drink as much as possible.
6. Total time from prep to clean up: about 15 to 20 minutes. I can actually grind up almost a days worth. Cleaning up consists of rinsing out the blender, putting the veggies away, and wiping the counter.
7. It's cheaper because I am not dropping a ton of money on a juicer, and because it takes less vegetables to get the juice.
So far, in 7 days I have lost 6 pounds, and the feelings of clarity, laughter, joy, and heightened energy is indescribable, priceless really.
And for the first time in my entire life of juice fasting and cleansing, I have not experienced any excruciating hunger pangs like before. (knock on wood!)
But I am not just juicing and cleansing my body. I am combining this with a process of deep breathing and spiritual transcendence - of asking 108 Infinite Beingness Questions every single day. This is what makes this unique.
I guess you could call this "The Daniel Peebles Juice-Gorging Spiritual Awakening 92 Days Festival"
I am not doing a "juice feast" as it is exactly described on http://www.juicefeasting.com/. My understanding from just reading the site, is this:
1. You actually juice the greens and vegetables through a juicer, removing the fiber from it, and drink enough whole juice to equal the same amount in calories that you would normally consume from eating solid food. You do it for 30 to 92 days.
2. You give yourself enimas, get colonics, and take other supplements.
I am sure there is a TON more information than that - but that is what I can glean from their awesome website. They are true pioneers.
First, I don't want to go through that, because of several reasons:
1. The enormous time it would take to do all that juicing. I read blogs of it taking an hour to juice all the juice that you need. Then there is clean up, prep, and all that would amount to it taking WAY TO MUCH TIME for me, a father of 4 kids, a full-time law practice, commuting at least 2 to 3 hours a day from court to court. The time involved - can't do it.
2. The enormous cost of buying all those vegetables. If I bought organic, I would be spending enormous amounts of money on vegetables alone. Organic vegetables are very expensive. Organic apples cost 5 to 6 bucks a back. What also makes the cost go up, is that it takes a lot of vegetables to make enough juice to drink over a gallon a day.
3. Dropping 300 to 500 bucks on a juicer. I am stubborn - I am not going to spend that much on a juicer so I can sit and juice, juice, juice. And, the whole vitamix thing, really makes me mad. All it is, is one huge expensive blender. Why buy a vita-mix, when my Oyster blender blends it perfectly for me? Don't get it, and I am not going to spend 500 bucks to get started, then spend ALL THAT TIME juicing vegetables and ALL THAT MONEY buying them.
For me, and speaking ONLY FOR MYSELF, that is not sustainable.
SO, here is what I have been doing for the past 6 days, and it really seems to work for me:
1. I use my 8 year old Oyster Blender.
2. I take a bunch of green leafy vegetables (so far: kale, cauliflower, cabbage, collard greens, spinach, carrots, and so far the following fruits: apples, blueberries, and pears) I shred them into smaller pieces, and I fill up my blender about half-way with different recipes and concoctions.
3. I then fill it up about half-way with organic apple juice, and then the rest of the way with Distilled Water (to not use so much apple juice). Sometimes I put in some soy milk, and some times I put in Hemp Oil and some really powerful superfood green powder.
4. Then I fill up my 20 ounce container, and drink it down.
5. I drink as much as I can during the day. I don't think I have gotten a gallon of juice down into me, but I try to drink as much as possible.
6. Total time from prep to clean up: about 15 to 20 minutes. I can actually grind up almost a days worth. Cleaning up consists of rinsing out the blender, putting the veggies away, and wiping the counter.
7. It's cheaper because I am not dropping a ton of money on a juicer, and because it takes less vegetables to get the juice.
So far, in 7 days I have lost 6 pounds, and the feelings of clarity, laughter, joy, and heightened energy is indescribable, priceless really.
And for the first time in my entire life of juice fasting and cleansing, I have not experienced any excruciating hunger pangs like before. (knock on wood!)
But I am not just juicing and cleansing my body. I am combining this with a process of deep breathing and spiritual transcendence - of asking 108 Infinite Beingness Questions every single day. This is what makes this unique.
I guess you could call this "The Daniel Peebles Juice-Gorging Spiritual Awakening 92 Days Festival"
Today
Today, I have completed my 92 two day juice festival, because when day 92 comes, it will be today.
Even though it is only day 7, I am a success because I have completed this ONE DAY of juicing.
If I can complete ONE SUCCESSFUL DAY of drinking nothing but RAW, BLENDED, WHOLE, DELICIOUS VEGETABLES AND FRUITS, then I have completed the 92 days.
Because it is always today.
Even though it is only day 7, I am a success because I have completed this ONE DAY of juicing.
If I can complete ONE SUCCESSFUL DAY of drinking nothing but RAW, BLENDED, WHOLE, DELICIOUS VEGETABLES AND FRUITS, then I have completed the 92 days.
Because it is always today.
one day - one moment - at a time
I have decided that I absolutely need a "one day at a time" mindset if I am going to succeed long-term.
If I think, "I am doing a 92 day juice-feast/feat/gorge," then the whole weight of that 92 days will weigh down my mind every single day, and it will feel like I am carrying an entire mountain on my shoulders. Discouraging thoughts will then come, like...
"Are you insane? You can't make it 92 days. This is crazy. That's too long!!!!"
Then it become very, very hard to make it through just one day!
So instead:
I am on a one day juice feasting/binging/gorging journey. I am only doing this for one day! I am committed to staying in this moment. And s-t-r-e-t-c-h-i-n-g this moment out into another, and into another, completing one whole day.
Yes, my intention is to stretch all of these moments, all of these days, into a stretch of 92 of them, but TODAY, I am juicing for TODAY, and FOR THIS MOMENT ONLY!
If I think, "I am doing a 92 day juice-feast/feat/gorge," then the whole weight of that 92 days will weigh down my mind every single day, and it will feel like I am carrying an entire mountain on my shoulders. Discouraging thoughts will then come, like...
"Are you insane? You can't make it 92 days. This is crazy. That's too long!!!!"
Then it become very, very hard to make it through just one day!
So instead:
I am on a one day juice feasting/binging/gorging journey. I am only doing this for one day! I am committed to staying in this moment. And s-t-r-e-t-c-h-i-n-g this moment out into another, and into another, completing one whole day.
Yes, my intention is to stretch all of these moments, all of these days, into a stretch of 92 of them, but TODAY, I am juicing for TODAY, and FOR THIS MOMENT ONLY!
Day 7 - Feeling Great spiritually and physically
I am feeling really fantastic today on my juicing/spiritual journey. This morning I mixed up this coctail in the blender:
Raw:
Collard Greens
Celery
Kale
Pears
and a few blueberries.
Then I had my two beautiful sons come down, and we drank it together. We loved it. I am really grateful and inspired about how much my 8 and 7 year olds love raw blended juice!
Then I mixed in these two additional ingredients:
Hemp Oil
And deep, powerful green superfood powder.
Then, it became a deep green swampy looking mixture. I drank a little, went to my meditation service this morning.
It is now lunch time, and now I just finished drinking that huge thick "greeny." My stomach feels a little gurgly, but I feel really good.
On my spiritual growth:
I am feeling like my consciousness is unfolding and expanding in wonderful, amazing ways. This morning, I had a great meditation, and then a really awesome sunday service at The Unity Church of Lawrence, Kansas. The talk was on Martin Luther King, and the significance of Barack Obama becoming the president in two days!
Having two wonderful boys of color, one from India and one from Guatemala, and another child on the way in the next year from Ethiopia, I am deeply proud of this moment in history.
Deeply, deeply proud and honored to the point of tears!
Raw:
Collard Greens
Celery
Kale
Pears
and a few blueberries.
Then I had my two beautiful sons come down, and we drank it together. We loved it. I am really grateful and inspired about how much my 8 and 7 year olds love raw blended juice!
Then I mixed in these two additional ingredients:
Hemp Oil
And deep, powerful green superfood powder.
Then, it became a deep green swampy looking mixture. I drank a little, went to my meditation service this morning.
It is now lunch time, and now I just finished drinking that huge thick "greeny." My stomach feels a little gurgly, but I feel really good.
On my spiritual growth:
I am feeling like my consciousness is unfolding and expanding in wonderful, amazing ways. This morning, I had a great meditation, and then a really awesome sunday service at The Unity Church of Lawrence, Kansas. The talk was on Martin Luther King, and the significance of Barack Obama becoming the president in two days!
Having two wonderful boys of color, one from India and one from Guatemala, and another child on the way in the next year from Ethiopia, I am deeply proud of this moment in history.
Deeply, deeply proud and honored to the point of tears!
Saturday, January 17, 2009
Added reflection
When I took my boys to the Pizza Place, and watched them both gorge out, I was present with them, and had a really great time.
I wasn't bothered by the smells or the sights of food because of the Rose Oil, and because I am learning how to detach and dissociate with the thought of eating solid food.
I am trying to imagine how more, or less, I would have connected with them if I had been eating too...
The argument for being more connected by NOT eating:
If I am not eating, I am focusing on the other people more, and talking, enjoying, and being present with them. My thoughts and attention can be on them, and not on the food.
The argument for being more connected BY eating:
There is an emotional and mental connection when people eat together. It is communal, and it goes way back into the farthest reaches of our DNA.
ANYWAY, bla bla bla....
These are good thoughts to explore...
I wasn't bothered by the smells or the sights of food because of the Rose Oil, and because I am learning how to detach and dissociate with the thought of eating solid food.
I am trying to imagine how more, or less, I would have connected with them if I had been eating too...
The argument for being more connected by NOT eating:
If I am not eating, I am focusing on the other people more, and talking, enjoying, and being present with them. My thoughts and attention can be on them, and not on the food.
The argument for being more connected BY eating:
There is an emotional and mental connection when people eat together. It is communal, and it goes way back into the farthest reaches of our DNA.
ANYWAY, bla bla bla....
These are good thoughts to explore...
Hardest Challenge
My most difficult challenge in maintaining an all raw, blended juice diet for 92 days is going out on a date with my lovely wife, Christine.
This afternoon she mentioned the prospect of me having a bowl of lentil soup when we go out together tonight. I said no, because it would lead me to eating again.
If I sit there while she eats, she will feel awkward, like I am staring at her eat. Plus, there is an added level of energetic, emotional communion when two people both eat together. So this is really hard for me. I really want to connect, at the same time, I am really feeling like this could truly be sustainable for the whole 92 days. I am feeling fantastic, clear, happy, energetic, alive, full of humor, I am growing spiritually, and I haven't felt better in a long time.
So we are going to go out and eat together, and I am going to have the delicious Rose Lemonade that they serve, and I am going to look into her beautiful eyes and laugh and talk and smile like we always do. I am going to make the conscious effort to connect and commune around the experience of eating, just without chomping my jaws together and swallowing food.
This afternoon she mentioned the prospect of me having a bowl of lentil soup when we go out together tonight. I said no, because it would lead me to eating again.
If I sit there while she eats, she will feel awkward, like I am staring at her eat. Plus, there is an added level of energetic, emotional communion when two people both eat together. So this is really hard for me. I really want to connect, at the same time, I am really feeling like this could truly be sustainable for the whole 92 days. I am feeling fantastic, clear, happy, energetic, alive, full of humor, I am growing spiritually, and I haven't felt better in a long time.
So we are going to go out and eat together, and I am going to have the delicious Rose Lemonade that they serve, and I am going to look into her beautiful eyes and laugh and talk and smile like we always do. I am going to make the conscious effort to connect and commune around the experience of eating, just without chomping my jaws together and swallowing food.
Queen Rose Oil
Today I took my two sons to Pizza Street, and took a small vile of pure Rose Oil with me. I put a dab under my nose, and She really protected me from King Pizza Smells and his army of sights and sounds of people eating.
I smelled the pizza, but it was in the background. The Rose Oil was the predominant smell. I have found something really awesome to guard my nose!
Also, Rose Oil is really awesome in raising my vibration anyway, so I am glad.
Thank you!
I smelled the pizza, but it was in the background. The Rose Oil was the predominant smell. I have found something really awesome to guard my nose!
Also, Rose Oil is really awesome in raising my vibration anyway, so I am glad.
Thank you!
Apple, Kiwi, Blueberry, Cantelope, Apple Juice, and a touch of Soy milk.
I had an afternoon fruit smoothie, and it was really delicious.
I give this one and A plus!
Mind drool
There was a time when the intestinal fabricator came in contact with the inner-less dimension of nothing beyond it all.
This was when the universe collapsed into the colon of a carrot eating munchkin, who laughed and giggled as he walked along the path of foolishness.
This was when the universe collapsed into the colon of a carrot eating munchkin, who laughed and giggled as he walked along the path of foolishness.
My affirmative prayer for 2009
I now affirmatively declare and command from the deepest power of my mind, body, and soul that 2009 is the year when I added at least 15 quality, rich, and wonderful years to my life...
2009 is the year in which I finally shed all the excess pounds and neutralized the emotional hooks, traumas, stresses, and hang-ups that caused me to keep the extra 20 pounds on my body for over 10 years...
2009 is the year in which truly began to expand my consciousness...
2009 is the year in which I didn't shrink from my power or magnificence, but rose to the challenge of embodying who I truly am on all levels of my being...
2009 is the year in which I let go of the constant need to search for things to be frightened of, or to panic about...
2009 is the year in which I asked myself, on the deepest level of who I am, and received the answer in the form of spontaneous joy and ever new bliss that never ceases...
2009 is the year in which I forgave myself on even deeper levels, and let-go of my grievances toward others in the same way...
2009 is the year in which I began to deeply peer into the fabric of reality and laugh at the comic dream of it all...
2009 is the year in which I finally shed all the excess pounds and neutralized the emotional hooks, traumas, stresses, and hang-ups that caused me to keep the extra 20 pounds on my body for over 10 years...
2009 is the year in which truly began to expand my consciousness...
2009 is the year in which I didn't shrink from my power or magnificence, but rose to the challenge of embodying who I truly am on all levels of my being...
2009 is the year in which I let go of the constant need to search for things to be frightened of, or to panic about...
2009 is the year in which I asked myself, on the deepest level of who I am, and received the answer in the form of spontaneous joy and ever new bliss that never ceases...
2009 is the year in which I forgave myself on even deeper levels, and let-go of my grievances toward others in the same way...
2009 is the year in which I began to deeply peer into the fabric of reality and laugh at the comic dream of it all...
Pizza Street
My son, Sky, had five "green" days in a row at school, and in doing so, has earned a trip to Pizza Street.
And his green-juice-gorged Dad is the one who is going to take him today.
On day 6 of my 92 day juice gorging journey, I am going into enemy territory.
I now call upon the highest forces of mind, body, spirit, and transcendence within me to go into this arena of "feed-bag strapping pizza eating" and emerge even stronger and more grounded in my journey of transforming my health and consciousness in 2009.
And his green-juice-gorged Dad is the one who is going to take him today.
On day 6 of my 92 day juice gorging journey, I am going into enemy territory.
I now call upon the highest forces of mind, body, spirit, and transcendence within me to go into this arena of "feed-bag strapping pizza eating" and emerge even stronger and more grounded in my journey of transforming my health and consciousness in 2009.
So what is this blog?
Is this blog about a spiritual adventure of mind and body in asking and reflecting the same 108 questions every day for the year of 2009?
Or is this blog about a 92 day juice-feast, fast, gorge, binge, and about all the benefits and challenges, ups and downs that come along with that?
I have been wondering about this.
This blog started out as a journey of asking the 108 Infinite Beingness Questions, and during that process, I was spontaneously inspired to clean out with juice for a long period of time.
Now I am finding out how the two compliment each other in such powerful ways.
The juice is clearing out the space in my cells, so that my consciousness can penetrate into and through my cells and find my beingness beyond them.
Or is this blog about a 92 day juice-feast, fast, gorge, binge, and about all the benefits and challenges, ups and downs that come along with that?
I have been wondering about this.
This blog started out as a journey of asking the 108 Infinite Beingness Questions, and during that process, I was spontaneously inspired to clean out with juice for a long period of time.
Now I am finding out how the two compliment each other in such powerful ways.
The juice is clearing out the space in my cells, so that my consciousness can penetrate into and through my cells and find my beingness beyond them.
Felt a crash last night
Last night I felt drained and "chrashy" like all my energy was getting sucked down a black hole. this was followed by an absolutely amazing day of clarity, smiles, insights, inspiration, good energy, and a lot of laughter.
When I got out of the depositions, (which were an amazingly clear and effortless experience) I drove home and slammed a bunch of liquid greens that I had blended up for myself that morning. I had it in a huge glass bottle.
Anyway, I get home and start grinding up some more greens, and my stomach starts gurgling and flopping and aching and pinching. Then my energy started to crumble. I felt really tired.
Then I realized that I had not had my protein smoothie that day. So I drank a protein drink, and immediately felt the protein flood into my blood and smack my brain. It was a delicious, wonderful, whole body feeling.
I felt better. My lack of energy may have been caused by not having protein.
Then I drank my nightly fruit smoothie, and watched a movie with Christine, and slept really good.
Now it is the next morning, and I feel ready to go. My energy is back, my stomach feels good, and my head is clear.
When I got out of the depositions, (which were an amazingly clear and effortless experience) I drove home and slammed a bunch of liquid greens that I had blended up for myself that morning. I had it in a huge glass bottle.
Anyway, I get home and start grinding up some more greens, and my stomach starts gurgling and flopping and aching and pinching. Then my energy started to crumble. I felt really tired.
Then I realized that I had not had my protein smoothie that day. So I drank a protein drink, and immediately felt the protein flood into my blood and smack my brain. It was a delicious, wonderful, whole body feeling.
I felt better. My lack of energy may have been caused by not having protein.
Then I drank my nightly fruit smoothie, and watched a movie with Christine, and slept really good.
Now it is the next morning, and I feel ready to go. My energy is back, my stomach feels good, and my head is clear.
Friday, January 16, 2009
Why is freedom my eternal now choice?
This questions helps me remember that on the pinhead of the present moment I always have the choice to step into the inherent freedom within me.
The door into freedom is always open.
I just have to shut the doors to the future and the past and sit in this chair, before it will open.
The door into freedom is always open.
I just have to shut the doors to the future and the past and sit in this chair, before it will open.
Day 5 of juice-gorging and Day 18 of asking myself spiritual questions
Smiling on the inside and outside, I am sitting at the AT&T building in downtown kansas city.
This is day 18 of asking, breathing, and reflecting the 108 infinite beingness questions into my cells, atoms, mind and soul. And it is now day 5 of my juice gorging journey. Right now, I am blogging on my I-phone. My thumbs are getting more adept at finding the keys, and plus the phone corrects all my mistakes on the fly, which saves countless minutes of backspacing.
I had a long drive through the unexpected snow this morning to get to court. There were several accidents.
After 18 days of asking these questions, I do feel a lot of changes gradually arising from within me. Enter the juice of collard greens, kale, carrots, cucumber, spinach, broccoli, and all the rest, and the changes are more clearly perceived.
1. Clarity of mind.
The all raw juice regimen has really cleared the cobwebs from my mind, and the questions are helping me be the "sacred observer" of my thoughts, and of the dramas of life that are constantly coming and going. Even when I stress out, I watch myself stressing out, which is a really interesting perspective. It's like the "witnessing me" says, "Oh, this is
Daniel stressing out." And I watch. And I stress out. I do both.
This is more interesting than anything else.
2. Perseptive
I am feeling myself much more able to perceive thoughts, subtleties, innuendos, and the intentions of others. I am not sure how accurate any of my perceptions are but I am noticing myself sensing and feeling on much deeper levels. The clarity of mind really helps this a lot. This morning on my long snowy drive it felt like every light in my brain was turned on, and I felt myself perceiving deeply into reality. This felt absolutely beyond fantastic. It is a magnificent trade off for feeling hungry at times.
This is day 18 of asking, breathing, and reflecting the 108 infinite beingness questions into my cells, atoms, mind and soul. And it is now day 5 of my juice gorging journey. Right now, I am blogging on my I-phone. My thumbs are getting more adept at finding the keys, and plus the phone corrects all my mistakes on the fly, which saves countless minutes of backspacing.
I had a long drive through the unexpected snow this morning to get to court. There were several accidents.
After 18 days of asking these questions, I do feel a lot of changes gradually arising from within me. Enter the juice of collard greens, kale, carrots, cucumber, spinach, broccoli, and all the rest, and the changes are more clearly perceived.
1. Clarity of mind.
The all raw juice regimen has really cleared the cobwebs from my mind, and the questions are helping me be the "sacred observer" of my thoughts, and of the dramas of life that are constantly coming and going. Even when I stress out, I watch myself stressing out, which is a really interesting perspective. It's like the "witnessing me" says, "Oh, this is
Daniel stressing out." And I watch. And I stress out. I do both.
This is more interesting than anything else.
2. Perseptive
I am feeling myself much more able to perceive thoughts, subtleties, innuendos, and the intentions of others. I am not sure how accurate any of my perceptions are but I am noticing myself sensing and feeling on much deeper levels. The clarity of mind really helps this a lot. This morning on my long snowy drive it felt like every light in my brain was turned on, and I felt myself perceiving deeply into reality. This felt absolutely beyond fantastic. It is a magnificent trade off for feeling hungry at times.
Thursday, January 15, 2009
Do we live in a hologram?
Interesting question.
Many scientists totally believe it, and there is a lot of scientific evidence. Although I don't understand the science completely with my thinking brain, on a deeper level I conpletely get it.
Here are my ideas and thoughts about the Holographic Universe:
1. I believe that the human body is a hologram of the Universe.
2. I believe that through the breath and the penetrating, meditative mind, we can penetrate the hologram of the human body and access the entire universe.
3. In accessing the universe, we will be able to access enormous amounts of energy as well.
I have this vision in my mind of a group of people in every city, who take turns going into deep states of meditation. There are instruments hooked up to their finger-tips. As they meditate, and access the universe through their holographic bodies, they power their entire cities with the quantum energy in their fingertips.
This will be clean, pure, totally green energy released from the fingertips of these group of future meditators.
Once people realize how amazingly empty, transparent, and holographic the human body is, they will be able to use that to better humanity.
The whole concept of energy and transportation will be thrown on its head.
Just like if a toyota prius drove back in time, the horse and buggy owners would be totally blown away to see the future machine, if we were to take a peak into a hundred or two hundred years from now, we would also be blown away.
Many scientists totally believe it, and there is a lot of scientific evidence. Although I don't understand the science completely with my thinking brain, on a deeper level I conpletely get it.
Here are my ideas and thoughts about the Holographic Universe:
1. I believe that the human body is a hologram of the Universe.
2. I believe that through the breath and the penetrating, meditative mind, we can penetrate the hologram of the human body and access the entire universe.
3. In accessing the universe, we will be able to access enormous amounts of energy as well.
I have this vision in my mind of a group of people in every city, who take turns going into deep states of meditation. There are instruments hooked up to their finger-tips. As they meditate, and access the universe through their holographic bodies, they power their entire cities with the quantum energy in their fingertips.
This will be clean, pure, totally green energy released from the fingertips of these group of future meditators.
Once people realize how amazingly empty, transparent, and holographic the human body is, they will be able to use that to better humanity.
The whole concept of energy and transportation will be thrown on its head.
Just like if a toyota prius drove back in time, the horse and buggy owners would be totally blown away to see the future machine, if we were to take a peak into a hundred or two hundred years from now, we would also be blown away.
a different type of hunger and a different type of full
I am discovering a different kind of hunger and a different kind of full.
Now, when I need a "juicing" it feels like my whole body, like all my cells are hungry. And after I gulp down a green concoction of joy-juice, it feels like all my cells are filled. It is a really wonderful, full body ecstatic type of feeling. This may be because the juice goes straight into my bloodstream.
The whole thing isn't just confined to stomach hunger.
Interesting.
Now, when I need a "juicing" it feels like my whole body, like all my cells are hungry. And after I gulp down a green concoction of joy-juice, it feels like all my cells are filled. It is a really wonderful, full body ecstatic type of feeling. This may be because the juice goes straight into my bloodstream.
The whole thing isn't just confined to stomach hunger.
Interesting.
2 miles in 1 degree weather
This morning I ran 2 miles in 1 degree weather. I dressed warm, except for my legs. They immediately became numb, and then hurt, and then got more numb.
I realize that without the clarity that comes from juicing, I would not have went running today.
The inspiration and motivation to do healthy things must come from a clear mind and body.
I realize that without the clarity that comes from juicing, I would not have went running today.
The inspiration and motivation to do healthy things must come from a clear mind and body.
The thought of food
I am realizing, in my clarity of these powerful green juices, that I am addicted the thought of food.
Not food, but the thought of food.
I realize how completely obsessed with the thought of food that our culture is. Yes, we need to eat, obviously, but do we need to spend so many waking hours THINKING about eating? The smells, the variety, the palate, always thinking, obsessing, searching, burping, farting, pooping, eating some more, and then going through the whole thing all over again.
It's exhausting, when I really think about it.
It was last Sunday, when I had an acidy, bloated, burpy, swelled up stomach that I decided to do a 7 day juice fast. I was miserable.
Then, in just a few days of juicing, I decided to embark upon a larger, longer, more marathon like journey. And it is when I am clear in mind, do I see the addiction to the thought of food.
Not food, but the thought of food.
I realize how completely obsessed with the thought of food that our culture is. Yes, we need to eat, obviously, but do we need to spend so many waking hours THINKING about eating? The smells, the variety, the palate, always thinking, obsessing, searching, burping, farting, pooping, eating some more, and then going through the whole thing all over again.
It's exhausting, when I really think about it.
It was last Sunday, when I had an acidy, bloated, burpy, swelled up stomach that I decided to do a 7 day juice fast. I was miserable.
Then, in just a few days of juicing, I decided to embark upon a larger, longer, more marathon like journey. And it is when I am clear in mind, do I see the addiction to the thought of food.
A letter to myself in the future
Dear Daniel after 92 straight days of raw juicing,
Hi there, how are you feeling? Are you still around? Or did you turn into a Collard Leaf and float away into the wind?
Did you wither into nothing?
I am assuming that you made it. You survived. Not only survived, but I am hoping that you thrived. I am reaching out to you - to the potential realized future where you really did consume nothing but raw blended vegetables and fruits for 92 consecutive days. You, yes you. The one that made it, in THAT future.
I am not talking to the Daniel who gave up after 7 days and found all kinds of rationalizations for calling it quits. Nor am I talking to the Daniel who decided to call it quits after 30 days. I am talking to 92 Day Daniel.
How did you do it?
How do you feel?
How did you survive the smells? How about the Infinite Beingness Questions?
Do you feel a little more spiritually awake?
Have you been able to witness your thoughts about food, our culture of consumption, and what insights have you gleened from your 92 days?
How closer are you to adopting your baby from Ehiopia? Have you gotten a placement yet?
Have you written any more books? Whats going on?
Talk to me...
Hi there, how are you feeling? Are you still around? Or did you turn into a Collard Leaf and float away into the wind?
Did you wither into nothing?
I am assuming that you made it. You survived. Not only survived, but I am hoping that you thrived. I am reaching out to you - to the potential realized future where you really did consume nothing but raw blended vegetables and fruits for 92 consecutive days. You, yes you. The one that made it, in THAT future.
I am not talking to the Daniel who gave up after 7 days and found all kinds of rationalizations for calling it quits. Nor am I talking to the Daniel who decided to call it quits after 30 days. I am talking to 92 Day Daniel.
How did you do it?
How do you feel?
How did you survive the smells? How about the Infinite Beingness Questions?
Do you feel a little more spiritually awake?
Have you been able to witness your thoughts about food, our culture of consumption, and what insights have you gleened from your 92 days?
How closer are you to adopting your baby from Ehiopia? Have you gotten a placement yet?
Have you written any more books? Whats going on?
Talk to me...
Day four of juicing
Is it possible for me to go a full 92 days of drinking nothing juice blended from raw vegetables?
What transformations and insights would I gain from this experience?
Would I be able to withstand the attacks from King Smells and his army?
I would have to build a castle with a mote, and a huge wall, and build my own army of Collard Green and Broccoli Soldiers to fight off the onslaught.
Could I really do this?
I feel, today, like I could. The most I have ever gone on actually juice "fasting" is six days, but that was just drinking juice out of a bottle. This is different. It is blending up a bunch of green leafy vegetables and fruits a day, as many as I can, in a blender with apple juice, and drinking as much as I can stomach.
Another time I did a 12 day "Farina Fast" from whole food farmacy, which was a bunch of small food particles mixed with water. I was miserable about 50 percent of the time on that one, and my stomach started really, really hurting. I went through a 3 day wall, a 6 day wall, an 8 day wall, and then 9, 10, 11, and 12 was really, really hard.
So far, drinking all this raw juice, I am not feeling the total famine that I normally would be feeling. It is day 4 and so far I have not gone through the normall walls of hunger, grogginess, tiredness, etc.
Also, what is the relationship between the 108 Infinite Beingness Questions and my juicing journey?
Will the questions help the juicing? Will the juicing help clear open my mind and body so I can assimilate the questions and release them further into my mind?
I hope so.
What transformations and insights would I gain from this experience?
Would I be able to withstand the attacks from King Smells and his army?
I would have to build a castle with a mote, and a huge wall, and build my own army of Collard Green and Broccoli Soldiers to fight off the onslaught.
Could I really do this?
I feel, today, like I could. The most I have ever gone on actually juice "fasting" is six days, but that was just drinking juice out of a bottle. This is different. It is blending up a bunch of green leafy vegetables and fruits a day, as many as I can, in a blender with apple juice, and drinking as much as I can stomach.
Another time I did a 12 day "Farina Fast" from whole food farmacy, which was a bunch of small food particles mixed with water. I was miserable about 50 percent of the time on that one, and my stomach started really, really hurting. I went through a 3 day wall, a 6 day wall, an 8 day wall, and then 9, 10, 11, and 12 was really, really hard.
So far, drinking all this raw juice, I am not feeling the total famine that I normally would be feeling. It is day 4 and so far I have not gone through the normall walls of hunger, grogginess, tiredness, etc.
Also, what is the relationship between the 108 Infinite Beingness Questions and my juicing journey?
Will the questions help the juicing? Will the juicing help clear open my mind and body so I can assimilate the questions and release them further into my mind?
I hope so.
108 Infinite Beingness Questions
Why am I so easily able to deeply and completely relax?
How deeply am I relaxing now?
In what beautiful ways are my cells and atoms smiling open?
Why do I know that all these questions are saturated with light?
Why do I feel myself deeply absorbing all these light-filled questions with ease?
Why are my cells, atoms, mind, and heart opening with each deep inhaling breath?
And how joyously am I relaxing into my infinite freedom on each exhaling breath?
Why is my sacred breath one connected circle of freedom and light?
How is the radiant light of my heart opening wider now?
And how freely am I now releasing into the bursting, brilliant light of my heart?
In what simple, joyous ways am I now becoming conscious of my own magnificence?
How is the very current of my breath flowering open within me now?
How deeply and closely am I watching and witnessing the sacred movement of my breath?
In what miraculous ways is my conscious breath opening the infinite space within me?
Why do I know that I am one with infinite love?
Why is it so clear to me that I am infinite love?
And how am I feeling infinite love pour through my heart and hands now?
Who am I that is now resting as the infinite freedom of love?
Why are the deepest doors of my infinite being opening even wider now?
And why is it so easy for me to step into my infinite beingness now?
How is my conscious breath revealing the magnificent universe within me?
Why do I now feel that this whole universe is enfolded within my transparent body?
And how joyously and consciously am I feeling this universe unfold from within me now?
Why do I know myself as the infinite being that I am?
Who am I that knows who I really am?
How is my body now revealing to me its magnificent non-existence?
And why do I now clearly see my body as a transparent vibration of joyous light?
Why do I absolutely know that I am infinitely free?
Why am I following my breath into the feeling and aliveness of my body?
And how does this feeling and aliveness of my body carry me beyond the body?
In this eternal, ecstatic, now moment – why do I know myself as infinite freedom?
How is my freedom arising so perfectly from the stillness of this moment?
Why do I know that there is nothing for me to say or do to be the freedom that I am?
Why do I know that these questions are now released like birds into the sky of my superconscious mind?
And how is my higher self absorbing and acting upon these questions now?
How is my consciousness being transformed even more into pure, radiant, ever-new joy?
Why do I know myself as the joy that needs no name and no form to be?
In what joyous ways am I remembering the Infinite Beingness that I am?
How gracefully is the eternal memory of my Infinite Beingness arising into consciousness now?
Why is the crystal clear perfection of my soul so inwardly visible to me now?
How ecstatically am I now releasing into the perfection of my soul?
How is my consciousness opening wider and wider now?
Do I now choose to live, work, and play as grace?
As joy?
As freedom?
And as love?
And why does all sense of doing now dissolve into the freedom of allowing?
Why do I know that I am not the doer?
Why do I know that I am the sacred witness of unfolding perfection?
How is my life now unfolding with perfect clarity, joy, and grace?
Why is it so natural for me to let-go of wanting to control?
Do I now choose to release the wanting to control?
Why am I so genuinely happy to let-go of wanting to control?
Why do I know that I am the love that can never attack or be attacked?
Why do I know that I am the love that can never defend or be defended?
And do I now choose to remember that I am pure, innocent, indestructible love?
Why do I know that in the innocent beingness of love – I am free?
How deeply am I now surrendering to the innocent beingness of love?
Why do I know that the body and all objects in the world are merely illusions that are constantly arising and disappearing?
And why do I know that I am the freedom that is, before and after they disappear?
Why do I know that my freedom is permanent, immovable, and infinite?
Why do I know that, as freedom, I can do and be anything I choose?
And why do I now realize that I am the freedom beyond all doing and all choosing?
Why do I know that my beingness transcends the thinking mind?
How closely and consciously am I now watching my thoughts?
And who am I that is eternally witnessing my thoughts?
Am I the freedom between and behind all thoughts?
And am I that joy that permeates and transcends all thoughts?
Do I now choose to let-go of identifying with this transparent body?
Am I the cosmic body of universal light?
Is it now time for me to stop pretending to be the small and limited body?
And do I now choose to realize the Infinite Beingness that I am?
Why do I know that I am one with the Infinite?
Why do I now realize my oneness with Infinite Nurturing Grace?
Am I sinking deeper and deeper into the infinite depths of ever-new joy within me?
Am I going deeper and deeper still?
Why do I know that there is no end to the depths of joy within me?
What transcendent joy is now arising from the untold depths of my being?
Why do I know that my cells and atoms contain this entire ecstatic universe?
How am I beholding the whole universe within my transparent body of joyous light?
Why do I now realize that my body is the universe, and the universe is my body?
How ecstatically am I now communing in oneness with all life everywhere?
How are these questions being set free into the sky of my superconscious mind?
How is my higher self absorbing and acting upon these questions now?
Why is freedom my eternal now choice?
Why do I now choose freedom above all else?
Why do I know that my body is a dream within a dream?
Am I the ecstatic, ever-awakened joy that is eternally witnessing this dream-body?
Why do I know myself as a drop of love in the ocean of love?
And how is the ocean of love arising and awakening within me now?
Why do I now choose the freedom that I am and have always been?
Why do I now superconsciously choose the awakening of freedom?
Why is it so easy and so natural for me to let-go?
Why am I now letting-go with such ease?
Why am I releasing at the core my being?
How am I feeling the ecstasy of this core release now?
Why am I so joyously letting everything go?
And who am I when everything is released?
Am I the permanent, unmoving, ever-new freedom and joy that is beyond all releasing?
Why am I so boundlessly happy?
Why am I overflowing with so much joy?
What makes this moment of my life so joyous and supreme?
Why is the radiant smile of my heart opening wider and wider now?
How easily is the light of my eternal smile shining into all of life?
Why am I so aware of the presence of ever-new joy within me?
How am I feeling this ecstatic awakening arise within me now?
Who am I that knows I am infinitely joyous, awake and free?
And how may I now drink from the joyous cup of my own transcendent love?
How deeply am I relaxing now?
In what beautiful ways are my cells and atoms smiling open?
Why do I know that all these questions are saturated with light?
Why do I feel myself deeply absorbing all these light-filled questions with ease?
Why are my cells, atoms, mind, and heart opening with each deep inhaling breath?
And how joyously am I relaxing into my infinite freedom on each exhaling breath?
Why is my sacred breath one connected circle of freedom and light?
How is the radiant light of my heart opening wider now?
And how freely am I now releasing into the bursting, brilliant light of my heart?
In what simple, joyous ways am I now becoming conscious of my own magnificence?
How is the very current of my breath flowering open within me now?
How deeply and closely am I watching and witnessing the sacred movement of my breath?
In what miraculous ways is my conscious breath opening the infinite space within me?
Why do I know that I am one with infinite love?
Why is it so clear to me that I am infinite love?
And how am I feeling infinite love pour through my heart and hands now?
Who am I that is now resting as the infinite freedom of love?
Why are the deepest doors of my infinite being opening even wider now?
And why is it so easy for me to step into my infinite beingness now?
How is my conscious breath revealing the magnificent universe within me?
Why do I now feel that this whole universe is enfolded within my transparent body?
And how joyously and consciously am I feeling this universe unfold from within me now?
Why do I know myself as the infinite being that I am?
Who am I that knows who I really am?
How is my body now revealing to me its magnificent non-existence?
And why do I now clearly see my body as a transparent vibration of joyous light?
Why do I absolutely know that I am infinitely free?
Why am I following my breath into the feeling and aliveness of my body?
And how does this feeling and aliveness of my body carry me beyond the body?
In this eternal, ecstatic, now moment – why do I know myself as infinite freedom?
How is my freedom arising so perfectly from the stillness of this moment?
Why do I know that there is nothing for me to say or do to be the freedom that I am?
Why do I know that these questions are now released like birds into the sky of my superconscious mind?
And how is my higher self absorbing and acting upon these questions now?
How is my consciousness being transformed even more into pure, radiant, ever-new joy?
Why do I know myself as the joy that needs no name and no form to be?
In what joyous ways am I remembering the Infinite Beingness that I am?
How gracefully is the eternal memory of my Infinite Beingness arising into consciousness now?
Why is the crystal clear perfection of my soul so inwardly visible to me now?
How ecstatically am I now releasing into the perfection of my soul?
How is my consciousness opening wider and wider now?
Do I now choose to live, work, and play as grace?
As joy?
As freedom?
And as love?
And why does all sense of doing now dissolve into the freedom of allowing?
Why do I know that I am not the doer?
Why do I know that I am the sacred witness of unfolding perfection?
How is my life now unfolding with perfect clarity, joy, and grace?
Why is it so natural for me to let-go of wanting to control?
Do I now choose to release the wanting to control?
Why am I so genuinely happy to let-go of wanting to control?
Why do I know that I am the love that can never attack or be attacked?
Why do I know that I am the love that can never defend or be defended?
And do I now choose to remember that I am pure, innocent, indestructible love?
Why do I know that in the innocent beingness of love – I am free?
How deeply am I now surrendering to the innocent beingness of love?
Why do I know that the body and all objects in the world are merely illusions that are constantly arising and disappearing?
And why do I know that I am the freedom that is, before and after they disappear?
Why do I know that my freedom is permanent, immovable, and infinite?
Why do I know that, as freedom, I can do and be anything I choose?
And why do I now realize that I am the freedom beyond all doing and all choosing?
Why do I know that my beingness transcends the thinking mind?
How closely and consciously am I now watching my thoughts?
And who am I that is eternally witnessing my thoughts?
Am I the freedom between and behind all thoughts?
And am I that joy that permeates and transcends all thoughts?
Do I now choose to let-go of identifying with this transparent body?
Am I the cosmic body of universal light?
Is it now time for me to stop pretending to be the small and limited body?
And do I now choose to realize the Infinite Beingness that I am?
Why do I know that I am one with the Infinite?
Why do I now realize my oneness with Infinite Nurturing Grace?
Am I sinking deeper and deeper into the infinite depths of ever-new joy within me?
Am I going deeper and deeper still?
Why do I know that there is no end to the depths of joy within me?
What transcendent joy is now arising from the untold depths of my being?
Why do I know that my cells and atoms contain this entire ecstatic universe?
How am I beholding the whole universe within my transparent body of joyous light?
Why do I now realize that my body is the universe, and the universe is my body?
How ecstatically am I now communing in oneness with all life everywhere?
How are these questions being set free into the sky of my superconscious mind?
How is my higher self absorbing and acting upon these questions now?
Why is freedom my eternal now choice?
Why do I now choose freedom above all else?
Why do I know that my body is a dream within a dream?
Am I the ecstatic, ever-awakened joy that is eternally witnessing this dream-body?
Why do I know myself as a drop of love in the ocean of love?
And how is the ocean of love arising and awakening within me now?
Why do I now choose the freedom that I am and have always been?
Why do I now superconsciously choose the awakening of freedom?
Why is it so easy and so natural for me to let-go?
Why am I now letting-go with such ease?
Why am I releasing at the core my being?
How am I feeling the ecstasy of this core release now?
Why am I so joyously letting everything go?
And who am I when everything is released?
Am I the permanent, unmoving, ever-new freedom and joy that is beyond all releasing?
Why am I so boundlessly happy?
Why am I overflowing with so much joy?
What makes this moment of my life so joyous and supreme?
Why is the radiant smile of my heart opening wider and wider now?
How easily is the light of my eternal smile shining into all of life?
Why am I so aware of the presence of ever-new joy within me?
How am I feeling this ecstatic awakening arise within me now?
Who am I that knows I am infinitely joyous, awake and free?
And how may I now drink from the joyous cup of my own transcendent love?
Wednesday, January 14, 2009
Mastering the art of shutting the door on smells
Today I went to the health food store and found the most beautiful picture of a collard green that I must post:
Isn't it beautiful? I got this Collard at the Merc today. Then I went to Dillons to get Christine some nose spray and Pepsi for her headache.
During both trips, I shut down the sense of smell to prevent me from smelling solid food while I was there.
It is like I am putting up a wall between my nose and my brain by choosing to be "congested" and breathing out of my mouth only. It sounds like I have a cold, but it sure beats the alternative of smelling food.
I am sure proud of that Collard.
Day three - still juicing and still asking
I am on the full 3rd day of my juicing program, and I am loving it!
Here is my regimen:
1. I cut up as many green leafy's as I can (kale, broccoli, spinach) and as many other raw veggies as I can, and put them in a blender, drop in some apple juice and distilled water, blend it up and SLAM IT DOWN. I try to drink as much as I can during the day.
2. I exercise every day. Every other day I do some light weight training and squats. And every other day I am walking or doing some other type of cardio. The other morning I froze my rump off walking three miles through 7 degree weather. It got so cold my trust I-phone froze up and had to be reset.
3. I do take one protein drink a day. EAS three stage protein. It is the best for keeping hunger pangs down and for eliminating soreness.
4. I take one multi-vitamin in the morning, one ginseng pill in the morning, and then one multi and one ginseng in the afternoon.
5. I try to guard against the smell of food. The smell of food is the hardest thing for me. I am beginning to breathe only through my mouth while my wife is cooking so the smells don't hit my brain.
6. I still drink my Yerba Mate Tea twice a day.
7. I drink Vitalagy every morning - which is a mich of mangosteen, noni, goji, and others.
8. I also mix a powerful green powder in with my juices. This is from whisperingweeds.com. It is called POWERFOODS and it is by far the very best green powder drink I have ever taken. What makes it so good is that it is not mass produced. It is from a master herbalist in Colorado who only makes so much at a time. He is a small business, but this stuff is absolutely amazing.
9. I am still releasing the 108 Infinite Beingness Questions into my mind every day. This year, so far, I have not missed a day. I am a hypnotherapist and Reiki Master Level Practitioner, and I have recorded the questions in a deeply relaxing, hypnotic, meditative voice - and I listen every day.
10. I am still energizing and meditating every day as well, according to Self-Realization Fellowship and Yogananda's teachings.
The hardest part, so far, is the smell of food. I need a good set of nose plugs! Normally, at day three, I would be hitting a wall, but drinking so much raw, blended juice, the hunger pains are much less. The protein drink is helping with this.
My goal and intention:
Is to go for at least 30 days on nothing but raw, blended juice - with the ultimate goal of going for 92 days. Many people who "juice-feast" say you need a Vita-Mix Blender, which costs about 400 SMACKERS. I am finding my 5 year old Oyster blender which I bought for less then 20 bucks, works just as well!
Foreseeable obstacles:
1. As I said before, the smell of food. I am a husband and father of 4 kids so far, with another on the way, so I need to help out with dinner. I have deeply enjoyed the delicious Rachael Ray meals that my wife has whooped up. Not eating with the family, and having to help prepare meals, will be hard. I am going to train my body to breathe out of my mouth during meal times, so I cut off from the smell of food. It all starts with the smell.
2. Thinking about food. When I go without solid food, I realize how much I think about food. Having done multiple fasts over the years, I am getting better at it. I am learning to just put food out of my mind, just put it off. Think about something else. All of this ties in with the smell of food as well. The smell brings up the thinking about food. Like right now, my wife made some cream of broccoli soup, and the smell has lingered in the house for at least 45 minutes after she has done eating it.
3. Going out. My wife and I love to go out to eat at our favorite local restaurants, and then go to a movie. Pigging out at dinner, and then pigging out during the movie, is a favorite past-time. My wife feels guilty eating in front of me during dinner, and then the smells of the restaurant come up. Again, I can be around food if I cut off the sense of smell during those times.
4. The cost of whole apples and the cost of apple juice. If I go to the health food store and buy the fancy schmancy organic healthy apple juice, I could go broke before I am half-way through. I found a cheaper organic "from concentrate" apple juice at the grocery store that is half price. I find it annoying that the organic is so expensive. Whole organic apples are also very expensive - five bucks a bag, but I refuse to eat the conventional apple. I'll just have to eat the cost.
The joys so far:
1. Watching me two boys down my green-concoctions with glee! They drink down these raw vegetables and absolutely love it! That is a true joy to watch.
2. The clarity of mind. I am much less tired in the morning, and my brain is feeling totally clear. I go through phases of feeling groggy and cranky, which is always follows with an even longer period of energy and clarity.
3. Feeling my spiritual awareness increase. This is invaluable.
4. Feeling myself slim down. This morning I was doing my squats, and I totally was bouncing back up from each squat.
90 days and onward!!
Victory to the power of love....
Here is my regimen:
1. I cut up as many green leafy's as I can (kale, broccoli, spinach) and as many other raw veggies as I can, and put them in a blender, drop in some apple juice and distilled water, blend it up and SLAM IT DOWN. I try to drink as much as I can during the day.
2. I exercise every day. Every other day I do some light weight training and squats. And every other day I am walking or doing some other type of cardio. The other morning I froze my rump off walking three miles through 7 degree weather. It got so cold my trust I-phone froze up and had to be reset.
3. I do take one protein drink a day. EAS three stage protein. It is the best for keeping hunger pangs down and for eliminating soreness.
4. I take one multi-vitamin in the morning, one ginseng pill in the morning, and then one multi and one ginseng in the afternoon.
5. I try to guard against the smell of food. The smell of food is the hardest thing for me. I am beginning to breathe only through my mouth while my wife is cooking so the smells don't hit my brain.
6. I still drink my Yerba Mate Tea twice a day.
7. I drink Vitalagy every morning - which is a mich of mangosteen, noni, goji, and others.
8. I also mix a powerful green powder in with my juices. This is from whisperingweeds.com. It is called POWERFOODS and it is by far the very best green powder drink I have ever taken. What makes it so good is that it is not mass produced. It is from a master herbalist in Colorado who only makes so much at a time. He is a small business, but this stuff is absolutely amazing.
9. I am still releasing the 108 Infinite Beingness Questions into my mind every day. This year, so far, I have not missed a day. I am a hypnotherapist and Reiki Master Level Practitioner, and I have recorded the questions in a deeply relaxing, hypnotic, meditative voice - and I listen every day.
10. I am still energizing and meditating every day as well, according to Self-Realization Fellowship and Yogananda's teachings.
The hardest part, so far, is the smell of food. I need a good set of nose plugs! Normally, at day three, I would be hitting a wall, but drinking so much raw, blended juice, the hunger pains are much less. The protein drink is helping with this.
My goal and intention:
Is to go for at least 30 days on nothing but raw, blended juice - with the ultimate goal of going for 92 days. Many people who "juice-feast" say you need a Vita-Mix Blender, which costs about 400 SMACKERS. I am finding my 5 year old Oyster blender which I bought for less then 20 bucks, works just as well!
Foreseeable obstacles:
1. As I said before, the smell of food. I am a husband and father of 4 kids so far, with another on the way, so I need to help out with dinner. I have deeply enjoyed the delicious Rachael Ray meals that my wife has whooped up. Not eating with the family, and having to help prepare meals, will be hard. I am going to train my body to breathe out of my mouth during meal times, so I cut off from the smell of food. It all starts with the smell.
2. Thinking about food. When I go without solid food, I realize how much I think about food. Having done multiple fasts over the years, I am getting better at it. I am learning to just put food out of my mind, just put it off. Think about something else. All of this ties in with the smell of food as well. The smell brings up the thinking about food. Like right now, my wife made some cream of broccoli soup, and the smell has lingered in the house for at least 45 minutes after she has done eating it.
3. Going out. My wife and I love to go out to eat at our favorite local restaurants, and then go to a movie. Pigging out at dinner, and then pigging out during the movie, is a favorite past-time. My wife feels guilty eating in front of me during dinner, and then the smells of the restaurant come up. Again, I can be around food if I cut off the sense of smell during those times.
4. The cost of whole apples and the cost of apple juice. If I go to the health food store and buy the fancy schmancy organic healthy apple juice, I could go broke before I am half-way through. I found a cheaper organic "from concentrate" apple juice at the grocery store that is half price. I find it annoying that the organic is so expensive. Whole organic apples are also very expensive - five bucks a bag, but I refuse to eat the conventional apple. I'll just have to eat the cost.
The joys so far:
1. Watching me two boys down my green-concoctions with glee! They drink down these raw vegetables and absolutely love it! That is a true joy to watch.
2. The clarity of mind. I am much less tired in the morning, and my brain is feeling totally clear. I go through phases of feeling groggy and cranky, which is always follows with an even longer period of energy and clarity.
3. Feeling my spiritual awareness increase. This is invaluable.
4. Feeling myself slim down. This morning I was doing my squats, and I totally was bouncing back up from each squat.
90 days and onward!!
Victory to the power of love....
Tuesday, January 13, 2009
Day 2
Day 2 of my juice fast is starting off pretty good. It is very cold outside, and today I need to stay home and take Liam to his dentist appointment.
I have lost a fair amount of water weight, and my body and stomach is starting to growl. Yesterday it was busy, so it was easier.
Today will be less busy, which will give my mind more time to think about food. I am putting food out of my mind. Out of my mind.
I have lost a fair amount of water weight, and my body and stomach is starting to growl. Yesterday it was busy, so it was easier.
Today will be less busy, which will give my mind more time to think about food. I am putting food out of my mind. Out of my mind.
Sunday, January 11, 2009
Divine Mother...
"Divine Mother... would you mind taking my mind, and put it in a safe place for me? Because if I keep asking myself these questions, I am going to lose it."
7 day juice fast begins today
I am grateful and honored to begin a 7 day juice fast. During the next 7 days, I will drink only juice, protein shakes, and water. I will also repeat and reflect the 108 Infinite Beingness questions into my mind and body on a deeper level.
By refraining from food, it is my intention to internalize and release these questions deeper into my mind. I will absorb them deeper into my cellular and subatomic intelligence.
I repeated and reflected these questions into my mind A TON today, to the point where my mind feels like they are overflowing with them. They are literally oozing out of my ears.
It has been 11 days of 2009 so far, and I am still going strong.
I am beginning to feel my consciousness expanding, getting more and more refined. I am feeling me fears begin to dissipate, and I am noticing my thoughts a lot more. I find myself watching myself talk and interact with my wife and family, and it is a new and wonderful feeling.
To be the witness.
By refraining from food, it is my intention to internalize and release these questions deeper into my mind. I will absorb them deeper into my cellular and subatomic intelligence.
I repeated and reflected these questions into my mind A TON today, to the point where my mind feels like they are overflowing with them. They are literally oozing out of my ears.
It has been 11 days of 2009 so far, and I am still going strong.
I am beginning to feel my consciousness expanding, getting more and more refined. I am feeling me fears begin to dissipate, and I am noticing my thoughts a lot more. I find myself watching myself talk and interact with my wife and family, and it is a new and wonderful feeling.
To be the witness.
Saturday, January 10, 2009
So that is my state of being
So, as I begin this journey, I realize that in 20 years of healing work, I have come a long way, but there is a long way to go.
I am beginning to feel my fears slowly melt away. Here is my practice:
1. Every day, I do my meditation exercises that I have learned and been initiated into by Paramahansa Yogananda, the great Indian Saint who brought secrets of yoga meditation to the West.
2. Every day, I ask the 108 Infinite Beingness Questions.
a. I breathe deeply and read and skim them, allowing them to absorb into my mind and body.
b. I also listen to my own recording of them.
The other day, as I sat in the Kansas City Municipal Court, waiting to pay a fine, I breathed deeply and energetically soaked them in. Afterward, as I was driving on to my next task for the day, I felt my shoulders were a tad bit lighter.
I am beginning to feel my fears slowly melt away. Here is my practice:
1. Every day, I do my meditation exercises that I have learned and been initiated into by Paramahansa Yogananda, the great Indian Saint who brought secrets of yoga meditation to the West.
2. Every day, I ask the 108 Infinite Beingness Questions.
a. I breathe deeply and read and skim them, allowing them to absorb into my mind and body.
b. I also listen to my own recording of them.
The other day, as I sat in the Kansas City Municipal Court, waiting to pay a fine, I breathed deeply and energetically soaked them in. Afterward, as I was driving on to my next task for the day, I felt my shoulders were a tad bit lighter.
So what are my fears? What is my state of being?
I would call my state of being fearful most of the time. I am hyper-vigilent. I am constantly on the look out.
Irrational fears are constantly flying through my mind like a flock of lost bats, searching for a cave.
There is a part of my mind that is always on the lookout for something to be afraid of, some kind of threat, someone out to get me, someone wants to hurt me.
Just now, I am beginning to watch that part of my brain. It is a deep place within me. Almost like an entity. It is always scanning the horizon of my life for something to be afraid of, something to go into panic mode over.
And almost all of the time, they are irrational. I will tell my wife what my thoughts are, and she always squints her face in disbelief. They are completely irrational and almost never do they make sense.
The law practice is fertile ground for the fear-part. There are always fears that my clients are going to get mad at me and try to hurt me. Or they are going to file a complaint against me, or the judge is going to yell at me, or I am going to make a mistake, lose my license, go broke, and my family and I will be living in cardboard boxes, bla bla bla....
They just never come.
I realize this: It is not that there are more things to be afraid of, but there is a part of my mind that is constantly searching, magnifying, creating, and manufacturing things to be afraid about.
My years of healing work and now my fragile-growing practice of meditation has helped alot. I am a lot better than I used to be. I have done an enormous amount of healing work.
So anyway, bla bla bla...
When Sky asked me if I had any fears, I had to laugh, because BOY DO I HAVE A LOT OF THEM.
I didn't want to turn into Adrian Monk and start a monologue of everything I am afraid of... because that would make it worse, so I chose a simple one.
"I am afraid that I am going to make a mistake, and the judge will yell at me."
So, my son Sky, with a big smile on his face, helped me with that fear.
Irrational fears are constantly flying through my mind like a flock of lost bats, searching for a cave.
There is a part of my mind that is always on the lookout for something to be afraid of, some kind of threat, someone out to get me, someone wants to hurt me.
Just now, I am beginning to watch that part of my brain. It is a deep place within me. Almost like an entity. It is always scanning the horizon of my life for something to be afraid of, something to go into panic mode over.
And almost all of the time, they are irrational. I will tell my wife what my thoughts are, and she always squints her face in disbelief. They are completely irrational and almost never do they make sense.
The law practice is fertile ground for the fear-part. There are always fears that my clients are going to get mad at me and try to hurt me. Or they are going to file a complaint against me, or the judge is going to yell at me, or I am going to make a mistake, lose my license, go broke, and my family and I will be living in cardboard boxes, bla bla bla....
They just never come.
I realize this: It is not that there are more things to be afraid of, but there is a part of my mind that is constantly searching, magnifying, creating, and manufacturing things to be afraid about.
My years of healing work and now my fragile-growing practice of meditation has helped alot. I am a lot better than I used to be. I have done an enormous amount of healing work.
So anyway, bla bla bla...
When Sky asked me if I had any fears, I had to laugh, because BOY DO I HAVE A LOT OF THEM.
I didn't want to turn into Adrian Monk and start a monologue of everything I am afraid of... because that would make it worse, so I chose a simple one.
"I am afraid that I am going to make a mistake, and the judge will yell at me."
So, my son Sky, with a big smile on his face, helped me with that fear.
My state of being as I begin this journey
I have been meaning to write about my state of being as I begin this journey. But before I begin, let me put it in the perspective of my 7 year old son, and his issues.
Sky has a deep and profound fear of abandonment. We adopted him when he was 17 months, and he internalized the trauma of leaving his foster-mother. He was perfectly fine for about three years, and then BOOM... all these issue came out.
We have done a lot of healing work for the past 2 years, helping him heal and clear that trauma. Mainly, we have used EMDR to help him attach emotionally to us, and from there, a lot more healing can continue. We have also used EFT a lot.
Last night, he was feeling very scared about having to "leave the family." So we did several rounds of EFT on that fear. The first round, the fear did not subside. The second round, it went down half-way. Then it went doen more. Several more, his fear went completely away.
During that short 10 minutes, I saw the light in my boy's eyes re-appear. He came alive. He perked up, and wanted to turn it around and help me with my fears.
"Do you have any fears, Daddy?"
I smiled. "Oh yes... I certainly do."
Sky has a deep and profound fear of abandonment. We adopted him when he was 17 months, and he internalized the trauma of leaving his foster-mother. He was perfectly fine for about three years, and then BOOM... all these issue came out.
We have done a lot of healing work for the past 2 years, helping him heal and clear that trauma. Mainly, we have used EMDR to help him attach emotionally to us, and from there, a lot more healing can continue. We have also used EFT a lot.
Last night, he was feeling very scared about having to "leave the family." So we did several rounds of EFT on that fear. The first round, the fear did not subside. The second round, it went down half-way. Then it went doen more. Several more, his fear went completely away.
During that short 10 minutes, I saw the light in my boy's eyes re-appear. He came alive. He perked up, and wanted to turn it around and help me with my fears.
"Do you have any fears, Daddy?"
I smiled. "Oh yes... I certainly do."
Still asking....
It is 10 days into 2009, and I am still asking the 108 Questions, although I have spruced them up and re-written some of the redundant ones.
Sunday, January 4, 2009
Saturday, January 3, 2009
Conversations with boredom
Boredom: "I am bored with these questions. I want to re-write them. Re-do them. This is BORING. I want to think of something else to do. Something more exciting. Come on! Let's go do something else."
In response: I smile, and continue to breathe open my being and peak into the multiple universes dancing within me.
Boredom is a road-sign that the ego throws up to divert us off the highway of bliss.
In response: I smile, and continue to breathe open my being and peak into the multiple universes dancing within me.
Boredom is a road-sign that the ego throws up to divert us off the highway of bliss.
A belly full of light
I close my eyes and fix my attention upon the center of concentration between my eyebrows...
I breathe in... as consciously and as deeply as possible... and I open the atom-curtains of my belly...
I breathe out... and fill my belly with light.
Light unfolds within my belly, and there is no longer a belly.
I demand the disappearance of my body.
I breathe in... as consciously and as deeply as possible... and I open the atom-curtains of my belly...
I breathe out... and fill my belly with light.
Light unfolds within my belly, and there is no longer a belly.
I demand the disappearance of my body.
My body is a soap bubble of light
My body is a soap bubble of light.
Beneath this physical form, behind the curtains of my atoms, is Infinite Stillness, Ever-New Joy, and Limitless Peace.
There is emptiness there. A silence. A perfect freedom.
Science is proving this. If I take my hand and place it under a super-sonic high-powered microscope and kept going deeper and deeper and deeper...
My hand disappears.
The inquisitive, curious mind is the most powerful microscope there is. With my long exhaling breath, I jump onto the currents of that flowing river.
Then I let go. I allow myself to feel myself through the vibration of my physical form...
And into freedom. Into silence. Into stillness.
Then I look back upon myself typing into this blog, and I smile.
I smile the SMILE that knows that my Beingness is beyond the body, all the while permeating the body with the eternal fragrance of the sweetest joy...
Beneath this physical form, behind the curtains of my atoms, is Infinite Stillness, Ever-New Joy, and Limitless Peace.
There is emptiness there. A silence. A perfect freedom.
Science is proving this. If I take my hand and place it under a super-sonic high-powered microscope and kept going deeper and deeper and deeper...
My hand disappears.
The inquisitive, curious mind is the most powerful microscope there is. With my long exhaling breath, I jump onto the currents of that flowing river.
Then I let go. I allow myself to feel myself through the vibration of my physical form...
And into freedom. Into silence. Into stillness.
Then I look back upon myself typing into this blog, and I smile.
I smile the SMILE that knows that my Beingness is beyond the body, all the while permeating the body with the eternal fragrance of the sweetest joy...
Head cold
Out of nowhere, I got a head cold. This week, I have gotten plenty of sleep. I have eaten well. I have exercised. I have done everything I am supposed to do, but I still have a head cold.
I am going to keep practicing the process of opening my atoms and cells with each conscious, deep, inhaling breath.
I am going to open the atoms of my sinuses and see that this head cold is an illusion.
I am going to keep practicing the process of opening my atoms and cells with each conscious, deep, inhaling breath.
I am going to open the atoms of my sinuses and see that this head cold is an illusion.
Two-Step Process
I have discovered a two-step process that makes this process of asking these 108 questions every day, much more effective:
1. I bathe the questions in Light-Love-Joy-Universal Energy. I hold the list of printed questions between my hands, and practice my holographic releasing meditation. As I breathe in, I open and expand my consciousness wider to the Whole Universe - to All That Love, All That Joy, All That Light. As I breathe out, I allow That Light-Love-Joy to flood through my hands, and into all 108 questions. I do this with the intention that these questions will be saturated with Light-Love-Joy, and that when I hear them, that Light-Love-Joy will be released and activated within me. It is like receiving a Reiki Treatment every time I read, ask, or listen to the questions.
2. I then ask, read, or listen to them. I feel All That Light-Love-Joy flowing into me and revealing to me who I really am.
Today, I did the above two steps together. As I listened, I bathed the questions in Light-Love-Joy. It went really well. I feel really good, even though I have a head cold.
1. I bathe the questions in Light-Love-Joy-Universal Energy. I hold the list of printed questions between my hands, and practice my holographic releasing meditation. As I breathe in, I open and expand my consciousness wider to the Whole Universe - to All That Love, All That Joy, All That Light. As I breathe out, I allow That Light-Love-Joy to flood through my hands, and into all 108 questions. I do this with the intention that these questions will be saturated with Light-Love-Joy, and that when I hear them, that Light-Love-Joy will be released and activated within me. It is like receiving a Reiki Treatment every time I read, ask, or listen to the questions.
2. I then ask, read, or listen to them. I feel All That Light-Love-Joy flowing into me and revealing to me who I really am.
Today, I did the above two steps together. As I listened, I bathed the questions in Light-Love-Joy. It went really well. I feel really good, even though I have a head cold.
108 Infinite Beingness Questions
Why am I so easily able to deeply and completely relax?
How deeply am I relaxing now?
In what beautiful ways are my cells and atoms smiling open?
Why do I know that all these questions are saturated with light?
Why do I feel myself deeply absorbing all these light-filled questions with ease?
Why are my cells, atoms, mind, and heart opening with each deep inhaling breath?
And how joyously am I relaxing into my infinite freedom on each exhaling breath?
Why is my sacred breath one connected circle of freedom and light?
How is the radiant light of my heart opening wider now?
And how freely am I now releasing into the bursting, brilliant light of my heart?
In what simple, joyous ways am I now becoming conscious of my own magnificence?
How is the very current of my breath flowering open within me now?
How deeply and closely am I watching and witnessing the sacred movement of my breath?
In what miraculous ways is my conscious breath opening the infinite space within me?
Why do I know that I am one with infinite love?
Why is it so clear to me that I am infinite love?
And how am I feeling infinite love pour through my heart and hands now?
Who am I that is now resting as the infinite freedom of love?
Why are the deepest doors of my infinite being opening even wider now?
And why is it so easy for me to step into my infinite beingness now?
How is my conscious breath revealing the magnificent universe within me?
Why do I now feel that this whole universe is enfolded within my transparent body?
And how joyously and consciously am I feeling this universe unfold from within me now?
Why do I know myself as the infinite being that I am?
Who am I that knows who I really am?
How is my body now revealing to me its magnificent non-existence?
And why do I now clearly see my body as a transparent vibration of joyous light?
Why do I absolutely know that I am infinitely free?
Why am I following my breath into the feeling and aliveness of my body?
And how does this feeling and aliveness of my body carry me beyond the body?
In this eternal, ecstatic, now moment – why do I know myself as infinite freedom?
How is my freedom arising so perfectly from the stillness of this moment?
Why do I know that there is nothing for me to say or do to be the freedom that I am?
Why do I know that these questions are now released like birds into the sky of my superconscious mind?
And how is my higher self absorbing and acting upon these questions now?
How is my consciousness being transformed even more into pure, radiant, ever-new joy?
Why do I know myself as the joy that needs no name and no form to be?
In what joyous ways am I remembering the Infinite Beingness that I am?
How gracefully is the eternal memory of my Infinite Beingness arising into consciousness now?
Why is the crystal clear perfection of my soul so inwardly visible to me now?
How ecstatically am I now releasing into the perfection of my soul?
How is my consciousness opening wider and wider now?
Do I now choose to live, work, and play as grace?
As joy?
As freedom?
And as love?
And why does all sense of doing now dissolve into the freedom of allowing?
Why do I know that I am not the doer?
Why do I know that I am the sacred witness of unfolding perfection?
How is my life now unfolding with perfect clarity, joy, and grace?
Why is it so natural for me to let-go of wanting to control?
Do I now choose to release the wanting to control?
Why am I so genuinely happy to let-go of wanting to control?
Why do I know that I am the love that can never attack or be attacked?
Why do I know that I am the love that can never defend or be defended?
And do I now choose to remember that I am pure, innocent, indestructible love?
Why do I know that in the innocent beingness of love – I am free?
How deeply am I now surrendering to the innocent beingness of love?
Why do I know that the body and all objects in the world are merely illusions that are constantly arising and disappearing?
And why do I know that I am the freedom that is, before and after they disappear?
Why do I know that my freedom is permanent, immovable, and infinite?
Why do I know that, as freedom, I can do and be anything I choose?
And why do I now realize that I am the freedom beyond all doing and all choosing?
Why do I know that my beingness transcends the thinking mind?
How closely and consciously am I now watching my thoughts?
And who am I that is eternally witnessing my thoughts?
Am I the freedom between and behind all thoughts?
And am I that joy that permeates and transcends all thoughts?
Do I now choose to let-go of identifying with this transparent body?
Am I the cosmic body of universal light?
Is it now time for me to stop pretending to be the small and limited body?
And do I now choose to realize the Infinite Beingness that I am?
Why do I know that I am one with the Infinite?
Why do I now realize my oneness with Infinite Nurturing Grace?
Am I sinking deeper and deeper into the infinite depths of ever-new joy within me?
Am I going deeper and deeper still?
Why do I know that there is no end to the depths of joy within me?
What transcendent joy is now arising from the untold depths of my being?
Why do I know that my cells and atoms contain this entire ecstatic universe?
How am I beholding the whole universe within my transparent body of joyous light?
Why do I now realize that my body is the universe, and the universe is my body?
How ecstatically am I now communing in oneness with all life everywhere?
How are these questions being set free into the sky of my superconscious mind?
How is my higher self absorbing and acting upon these questions now?
Why is freedom my eternal now choice?
Why do I now choose freedom above all else?
Why do I know that my body is a dream within a dream?
Am I the ecstatic, ever-awakened joy that is eternally witnessing this dream-body?
Why do I know myself as a drop of love in the ocean of love?
And how is the ocean of love arising and awakening within me now?
Why do I now choose the freedom that I am and have always been?
Why do I now superconsciously choose the awakening of freedom?
Why is it so easy and so natural for me to let-go?
Why am I now letting-go with such ease?
Why am I releasing at the core my being?
How am I feeling the ecstasy of this core release now?
Why am I so joyously letting everything go?
And who am I when everything is released?
Am I the permanent, unmoving, ever-new freedom and joy that is beyond all releasing?
Why am I so boundlessly happy?
Why am I overflowing with so much joy?
What makes this moment of my life so joyous and supreme?
Why is the radiant smile of my heart opening wider and wider now?
How easily is the light of my eternal smile shining into all of life?
Why am I so aware of the presence of ever-new joy within me?
How am I feeling this ecstatic awakening arise within me now?
Who am I that knows I am infinitely joyous, awake and free?
And how may I now drink from the joyous cup of my own transcendent love?
How deeply am I relaxing now?
In what beautiful ways are my cells and atoms smiling open?
Why do I know that all these questions are saturated with light?
Why do I feel myself deeply absorbing all these light-filled questions with ease?
Why are my cells, atoms, mind, and heart opening with each deep inhaling breath?
And how joyously am I relaxing into my infinite freedom on each exhaling breath?
Why is my sacred breath one connected circle of freedom and light?
How is the radiant light of my heart opening wider now?
And how freely am I now releasing into the bursting, brilliant light of my heart?
In what simple, joyous ways am I now becoming conscious of my own magnificence?
How is the very current of my breath flowering open within me now?
How deeply and closely am I watching and witnessing the sacred movement of my breath?
In what miraculous ways is my conscious breath opening the infinite space within me?
Why do I know that I am one with infinite love?
Why is it so clear to me that I am infinite love?
And how am I feeling infinite love pour through my heart and hands now?
Who am I that is now resting as the infinite freedom of love?
Why are the deepest doors of my infinite being opening even wider now?
And why is it so easy for me to step into my infinite beingness now?
How is my conscious breath revealing the magnificent universe within me?
Why do I now feel that this whole universe is enfolded within my transparent body?
And how joyously and consciously am I feeling this universe unfold from within me now?
Why do I know myself as the infinite being that I am?
Who am I that knows who I really am?
How is my body now revealing to me its magnificent non-existence?
And why do I now clearly see my body as a transparent vibration of joyous light?
Why do I absolutely know that I am infinitely free?
Why am I following my breath into the feeling and aliveness of my body?
And how does this feeling and aliveness of my body carry me beyond the body?
In this eternal, ecstatic, now moment – why do I know myself as infinite freedom?
How is my freedom arising so perfectly from the stillness of this moment?
Why do I know that there is nothing for me to say or do to be the freedom that I am?
Why do I know that these questions are now released like birds into the sky of my superconscious mind?
And how is my higher self absorbing and acting upon these questions now?
How is my consciousness being transformed even more into pure, radiant, ever-new joy?
Why do I know myself as the joy that needs no name and no form to be?
In what joyous ways am I remembering the Infinite Beingness that I am?
How gracefully is the eternal memory of my Infinite Beingness arising into consciousness now?
Why is the crystal clear perfection of my soul so inwardly visible to me now?
How ecstatically am I now releasing into the perfection of my soul?
How is my consciousness opening wider and wider now?
Do I now choose to live, work, and play as grace?
As joy?
As freedom?
And as love?
And why does all sense of doing now dissolve into the freedom of allowing?
Why do I know that I am not the doer?
Why do I know that I am the sacred witness of unfolding perfection?
How is my life now unfolding with perfect clarity, joy, and grace?
Why is it so natural for me to let-go of wanting to control?
Do I now choose to release the wanting to control?
Why am I so genuinely happy to let-go of wanting to control?
Why do I know that I am the love that can never attack or be attacked?
Why do I know that I am the love that can never defend or be defended?
And do I now choose to remember that I am pure, innocent, indestructible love?
Why do I know that in the innocent beingness of love – I am free?
How deeply am I now surrendering to the innocent beingness of love?
Why do I know that the body and all objects in the world are merely illusions that are constantly arising and disappearing?
And why do I know that I am the freedom that is, before and after they disappear?
Why do I know that my freedom is permanent, immovable, and infinite?
Why do I know that, as freedom, I can do and be anything I choose?
And why do I now realize that I am the freedom beyond all doing and all choosing?
Why do I know that my beingness transcends the thinking mind?
How closely and consciously am I now watching my thoughts?
And who am I that is eternally witnessing my thoughts?
Am I the freedom between and behind all thoughts?
And am I that joy that permeates and transcends all thoughts?
Do I now choose to let-go of identifying with this transparent body?
Am I the cosmic body of universal light?
Is it now time for me to stop pretending to be the small and limited body?
And do I now choose to realize the Infinite Beingness that I am?
Why do I know that I am one with the Infinite?
Why do I now realize my oneness with Infinite Nurturing Grace?
Am I sinking deeper and deeper into the infinite depths of ever-new joy within me?
Am I going deeper and deeper still?
Why do I know that there is no end to the depths of joy within me?
What transcendent joy is now arising from the untold depths of my being?
Why do I know that my cells and atoms contain this entire ecstatic universe?
How am I beholding the whole universe within my transparent body of joyous light?
Why do I now realize that my body is the universe, and the universe is my body?
How ecstatically am I now communing in oneness with all life everywhere?
How are these questions being set free into the sky of my superconscious mind?
How is my higher self absorbing and acting upon these questions now?
Why is freedom my eternal now choice?
Why do I now choose freedom above all else?
Why do I know that my body is a dream within a dream?
Am I the ecstatic, ever-awakened joy that is eternally witnessing this dream-body?
Why do I know myself as a drop of love in the ocean of love?
And how is the ocean of love arising and awakening within me now?
Why do I now choose the freedom that I am and have always been?
Why do I now superconsciously choose the awakening of freedom?
Why is it so easy and so natural for me to let-go?
Why am I now letting-go with such ease?
Why am I releasing at the core my being?
How am I feeling the ecstasy of this core release now?
Why am I so joyously letting everything go?
And who am I when everything is released?
Am I the permanent, unmoving, ever-new freedom and joy that is beyond all releasing?
Why am I so boundlessly happy?
Why am I overflowing with so much joy?
What makes this moment of my life so joyous and supreme?
Why is the radiant smile of my heart opening wider and wider now?
How easily is the light of my eternal smile shining into all of life?
Why am I so aware of the presence of ever-new joy within me?
How am I feeling this ecstatic awakening arise within me now?
Who am I that knows I am infinitely joyous, awake and free?
And how may I now drink from the joyous cup of my own transcendent love?
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
Posts
